How Ebola Virus Affects Nigerian Celebrities

jonathan

August 11, 2014 1:17 PM

After talking to a number of Nigerian celebrities and getting their thoughts on the new deadly virus, Pulse.ng's Joey Akan writes a letter to all their Nigerian fans, explaining the deepest fears of the stars. This is what they have been dying to tell you, but can't.

A Letter To All Our Concern Nigerian Fans Who Need To Know How Ebola Affects Us Too

Dear Fan,

Now we have Ebola. Now we know it's a national concern after it has claimed some lives and looks to kill more in the country. Now we can bend are heads in prayer, and seek help from a higher being to protect us all from this deadly disease. Now we can take life more gently, and seek a greater end.

All of us, except the entertainers. For we Nigerians in the entertainment industry, it's business as usual. We still have great concerts going on, massive parties to throw and attend, movies to act, songs to sing, hustling to be done, and money to be made.

On the surface, we seem impervious to all the chaos and attendant fear that the virus has brought to our shores. We seem a happy lot, content to live in our palatial homes, drink some expensive Champagne, have great sex with groupies, sing more songs, act more movies, shoot plenty of videos and wave at our fans.

But deep down, we're scared too. Ebola fever is not only bad for our business, it's evil. What happens if this virus spreads wide and far without a cure found. It'll kill our fans and patrons in their massive numbers, and with people striving to survive, entertainment will be the last thing on their minds.

No money will flow to us if Ebola continues. Inasmuch as Nigeria is a free land with lavish habits, and a propensity to display wealth, there will still be no one to look our way if this virus spreads. One of our great holds on the country is our ability to define the times and create a new way of life that seems cool to everyone. But with Ebola, everyone will switch to survival mode, not concerned about we all.

Let's get to the parties. We throw parties where we all come together, dance, drink, network, and just be...celebrities. In such a situation, we exchange body fluids. Dancing, shaking hands, sweating, kissing, and even wild sex are all strong forms of Ebola Virus transmission. If this happens, and the news spreads, then we won't have parties anymore, and no one can in good conscience come out to party....on the pain of death by Ebola.

That's bad for us too. No parties, no networking, and no new ideas...that will kill us all.

The problem here isn't just the deaths, it's much wider. We celebrities become irrelevant when the prevailing situation in the country is instability. It's akin to a full-blown war. But this time, the enemy is without form. It simply manifests in its victims. That's much worse.

Our jobs depend solely on the fans, and without the fans, there is no us. If Ebola Virus kills all Nigerians, then we the celebrities will be made useless and wretched.

Finally, the most important part: We too can also contract Ebola, and die. Celebrity status is not a stamp of immortality, it's just a trait of massive commercialisation of talent. And the new epidemic knows no social science. We too can fall ill and die.

That's the stark truth, and it is bad for business. Ebola is bad for we celebrities.

Do your best to stay alive, take all the health measures, the preventive steps, and guard against new infection. Hopefully, this will be one fast episode that will quickly see its curtain called. Let's all stick together.

Your Loving Celebrity,

D'banj or Don Jazzy or Banky W or Davido or Wizkid, or Genevieve Nnaji....whatever man, just pick any name. It's all of us talking to you.

jonathan