Your brother is wealthy, great! And so what?

yinka ogunlami

November 2, 2016 10:52 AM

Young as I was, I was amazed at how people could just look into a family, make conclusions and draft up a perfect wealth sharing plan as though they are the ordained family wealth distributor.

Your brother is wealthy, great! And so what?

I must have been 16 or so when a neighbour said to me, "Its so unfortunate that Mr. As brothers are wealthy and he is suffering." "His immediate elder brother owns a number of properties in Lagos and other states.

Why can't he gift him one of those so he can have a good financial standing, too? What would it cost him to give him this house to manage?"

It was even more sad because I knew Mr. A and his many escapades. His brothers had given him money on so many occasions but he always found a way to squander it. One way to know when his brothers had given him money was to watch out for a change of clothes and an invite to a birthday party (he always seemed to remember his birthday whenever he had free money). He had even been in partnership with one of his brothers who had to call it off because Mr. A was running the business down with his many withdrawals.

The story had been the same from day one as Mr. A could never hold down an investment. His brothers had been helping every way they could but they had to stop for it was doing neither party any good. His brothers now had families to consider.

Even so, that wasn't my problem.

My problem lay with the entitlement mentality that lady and Mr. A have–one which the average African with a wealthy relative has. That mentality that says "my relatives' wealth is ours". That mentality that pushes them to expect the wealthy relative to always sort them out even when all efforts to have them stand on their own have proved futile. That mentality that makes Mr. A think he's entitled to enjoy whatever his wealthy relative enjoys even without working for it because after all, "he's my brother."

The communal spirit we have in Africa can be a debilitating factor at times. One that predisposes a lot of people to laziness and slothful tendencies because after all, "I can always ask my brother for cash."

It's even worse when some people are quick to label whoever doesn't comply, a wicked sibling “who doesn't want me to enjoy like him”.

Enjoy what exactly? What you worked for or someone's sweat?

Dear African, your brother's money is not 'our money'. It's his money. And he has a right to decide how to use it.

Find something doing with your life.

Work for your own money. Seek to make your own name. The world is big enough. Let your brother be. Many at times, they also have challenges you know little about because you are so obsessed with the wealth you see.

Yes, your brother is rich but what are you doing for yourself?

Yes, your brother is rich but the assets aren't in your name. Don't you think it's high time you worked to build yours?

yinka ogunlami