5 things Senator would have done if court had ruled in his favour

The dress rehearsal of a new dance move of the controversial senator, Dino Melaye must have been disrupted when Justice Nnamdi Dimgba dismissed his recall suit and ordered the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) to proceed with the recall.

By now, we should have had a new viral meme that can be used to scorn enemies and a new song to deride detractors from the outspoken senate member, but the court put paid to all that happening.

Here at Pulse, we are not soothsayers but I can put my vote on the line that the senator would have given us some petty and amusing behaviour to celebrate his victory over the people who gave him the opportunity to be in the senate to make laws and collect wardrobe allowance.

Had the court stopped INEC from continuing with the recall process, our distinguished senator would have shamed and mocked everyone he felt was responsible for his predicament.

Honourable Melaye--for being who he is--would have blessed Nigerians and the internet with these five actions.

1. Ajekuniya remix: Senator Dino Melaye released a hot single in April 2017 to shame his political detractors. As a political artiste whose single is still enjoying playtime online, the senator was in London in August to perform the viral single at Nottinghill carnival

Had the judgement been positive, our distinguished senator would have cleared his baritone voice, scurried to the studio and added some juice and sauce to his hit single- Ajekuniya. Unfortunately, the senator lost his voice after the 'unpalatable' court pronouncement and then we are all denied another Ajekuniya moment.

2. Selfie: One of the many things for which Dino Melaye is known for is his love for camera. Five minutes after the court judgement, the senator representing Kogi West would have run into the red chamber to take a selfie to send a message that no "iyalaya anybody" can remove him from the senate. But the court pronouncement seems too bitter to swallow that the ABU graduate could not ostentatiously display his expensive phone to take a selfie.

3. New car in the garage: To celebrate his political victory, adding a new car to his fleet of exotic vehicles would have been considered the right thing to do to show the enemies he is the Daniel who serves a living God.

Our senator would have posed beside the new car with a scornful smile to deride the seekers of his downfall. This would also require another photo session with sycophants flanking him and smiling sheepishly to celebrate the one and only political activist from Kogi state.

4. Thanksgiving: Had the court asked INEC to stop the recall process, there would have also been a special thanksgiving service at the senator's church on Sunday, September 17.

The Senator would have given glory and adoration to the Almighty God for seeing him through the political tribulations and to express his gratefulness to God. Dino would submit himself to God, remove his cap, roll on the church floor in his gigantic Agbada like a kid trapped in old man's body and shouted Hallelujah endlessly. Who wouldn't like to join a submissive senator praise the Lord?

5. Sustain attack on enemies: After gratifying himself with everything there is, the senator would finally come for his enemies and those who accuse the Senate of earning too much. The senator would not spare Kogi Governor, Yahaya Bello who according to him is behind his political trial, the INEC for being used to pull him down and Itse Sagey for spewing 'non-sense' about the senate earnings.

All these could have happened, but the judgement of Justice Nnamdi Dimgba of an Abuja Federal High Court on the recall suit of the senator prevented these series of events that would have gone viral on social media from happening.

The court judgement might sound unpalatable to the senator but the good news for the Kogi West people is that INEC has promised to release the timetable for the recall of the honourable member of the Senate on Monday, September 18, 2017.