A lot of things that causes conflicts in relationships are things that could have been avoided. It is those little things when accumulated that eventually bring about the big problem. Life is too short to keep stressing over things that really of not as big of a deal as we make it seem.
When it comes to relationships or our loved ones, we naturally tend to expect so much from them. We expect them to be good or nice to us all the time, we secretly expect them to always put us first regardless and whatever they do, we think about it in terms of how it makes us feel before we stop to think about the ‘why’ behind their actions or response.
Someone you care less about would do the very thing but you would be less bothered compared to when your partner or someone you really care about does the same thing. This is just like the saying; to whom much is given, much is expected.
Conflicts in relationships are sometimes inevitable, but if you desire a long lasting relationship that very well manages conflicts, don’t sweat the small stuff. What this means is that, learn to overlook things or better still, see things in another perspective. Think about it, someone you love and loves you back will not deliberately hurt you.
Let’s face it, sweating the small stuff isn’t only about overlooking things, it also steam from an overly sense of right about one's opinion or judgment concerning a matter with no consideration for the other person’s point of view. When we sweat the small stuff, we not only hurt the other person, we hurt ourselves and the relationship.
Let’s make this clear, when we say ‘overlook things,’ this does not mean pretend that what the other person did, did not get to you, it means that look at things from another angle and try to understand the situation instead of instantly judging that your partner means harm. It also means that you should not worry so much about unnecessary details of right or wrong.
In the next post, we’ll list out common things or situations that we tend to sweat the small stuff and how to better manage those situations in order to avoid conflicts.
Written by OluwaKemi Adetola