Differences between self-confidence and narcissism

Narcissists have a bad reputation for a reason. Such people negatively impact the lives of others because they put themselves and their interests first.

Their behaviour is toxic, causing a loss of security and emotional balance in the partner. For these reasons, a relationship with a narcissist is considered extremely harmful.

Although there is a lot of talk about this danger, it must be remembered that people who are simply characterised by high self-confidence are also unfairly accused of narcissism.

Despite the apparent similarity of behaviour, both cases are different from each other. How can you tell them apart?

5 differences between healthy self-confidence and narcissism

Although both attitudes are sometimes combined and confused, the contrast between someone who simply has healthy self-esteem and a narcissist can be seen in relationships with other people. Here are some of the most important differences.

1. Acceptance versus uncertainty

People who are simply characterised by high self-confidence are also unfairly accused of narcissism [iStock] Pulse Nigeria

Self-confidence comes from belief in your own abilities, self-awareness and recognition of your strengths and weaknesses. A person with high self-esteem does not need to aggrandise himself or prove his worth.

Narcissism grows out of doubt and fear, not self-confidence, and can be a form of self-defense. Because of this, it can cause an overreaction to criticism, a desire for attention, and a need to manipulate in order to gain control over the environment.

2. Empathy versus arrogance

A self-confident person is able to take care of his own interests, but does not do it at the expense of others. He doesn't ignore other people's needs, he can empathise with other people's emotional states. Additionally, she is open, listens actively and engages in conversation.

In turn, a narcissist sees himself as someone better and does not care about the feelings and needs of others. Communication is usually one-sided, focused on him. He strives so hard to be the centre of attention that he doesn't care about getting to know the other person or understanding them.

ALSO READ: Ladies, here are 5 signs your man is narcissistic and controlling

3. Assertiveness versus admiration seeking

A person with healthy self-esteem skillfully expresses his or her own opinion, defends the boundaries set by himself, and at the same time respects the boundaries set by others. She is curious about people and has no problem with, for example, having to wait her turn when she wants to speak in a discussion.

The narcissist behaves as if he were the most important person: he seeks attention, exaggerates his achievements, seeks praise and makes a fuss about himself. In his case, his self-esteem depends on external recognition and admiration.

4. Selflessness versus egocentrism

A narcissist focuses mainly on his own interests [Freepik] Pulse Nigeria

A self-confident person with healthy self-esteem is able to notice and appreciate others and is willing to provide support.

The narcissist, on the other hand, ignores the needs of others. He is much more likely to do something because it benefits him than when asked to do it. He does not take the initiative out of pure concern, because he focuses mainly on his own interests.

5. Correct self-perception versus a distorted image

A person with healthy self-esteem does not pay excessive attention to his or her image and does not have to control or exaggerate it.

The narcissist, on the other hand, perceives himself in an exaggerated way, basing his sense of satisfaction on it. This allows him to feel better and mask his lack of self-confidence.

This article was originally published on Onet Woman.