Dear Bukky,

I’m from Imo state, I got a job in Abuja were I meet this Yoruba guy that is working in the same office with me. He asked me out, and I told him about my past experiences and I told him that I’m a single mother too and that I’m a very jealous lover and that once I’m in love and I’m dating I don't cheat on my guy and that I like being free in a relationship.

He agreed with me and when I asked him if he has any relationship already. He said no, that he doesn't have any one at the moment, that I am safe and that I should feel free.

After one year of dating, however, when I already fell so deeply in love with him, he told me he has a serious relationship, that she is from his place and that he met her before me. I asked why he lied to me in the first place and his response was that he never wanted to lose me.

Right now he keeps posting her pictures on his Whatsapp status and even telling me to my face about her. He’s not hiding it, and besides, he does not take me out with his friends and I don't even know where he is staying. He only comes to my place. And yet he still tells me that he loves me. Please I need advice from you right now. I am confused._______

Dear reader,

When someone claims to love you, it is not the words that you should pay attention to, it is what they do. Actions are more potent than what people say. Talk is pretty cheap.

What are this man’s actions telling you? To me, this looks like a relationship you should not be dealing with anymore. If he has a secret relationship he keeps nurturing, it may be time to let him go, to move on and just seek happiness elsewhere.

The other woman does not sound to me like a mistake. And if you have to beg for someone’s affection, then it is not worth much._______

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