Is there a place to draw the line when giving your partner money?

A viral story was once shared of how some guy took a quick loan of from his girlfriend for his business but it turned out that he used it to fund his wedding with another woman and it is scenarios like that that recreate the need to talk about lovers, and how money affects our romantic relationships.

When the effect of money on relationships and marriages is considered as a subject, it is often from the perspective of who pays for what, and how best partners should relate with each other’s money. But maybe it’s time to talk about where to draw the line when giving your boo money, and when interacting with them in a financial capacity.

First things first, it needs to be mentioned that relationships are meant to be two-sided and all efforts are meant to flow from both sides – from acts of affection to financial intercourse. In other words, helping each other meet financial needs is not bad in any way. Granting a loan, or giving money to help a lover’s course is a great gesture.

You should not feel too scared to share with your partner... even your finances. Department of communication

Whether you are in a relationship or married, if you can help a partner with some financial aid, go ahead and do it. If you are in a relationship with someone who you consider undeserving of your financial assistance, maybe they are undeserving of a relationship with you altogether.

Whatever you do, make sure that would do the same for you if they were in your shoes.

ALSO READ: What emotional intelligence means and why you can't last in a relationship without it

Where to draw the line

That being said, however, there’s a place to draw the line and that’s to never give more than you can do away with. It’s the same rule that applies with people who are not even in a relationship with you. If you can’t let a certain amount go, then don’t loan it to a boo. It’s a precautionary measure and it is a wise one, especially for people whose relationships are still at the early stages.

Not many things beat the feeling of being with the right person; the one who does not make you feel like a fool for loving them with all you've got. [Credit: CISB] Pulse Nigeria

In a marriage

When you are married, there’s more space to be 'daring' because of the wholeness that marriage presupposes. Being married means you are with the person in body, spirit and soul and should therefore be able to take more risks, to give more of yourself to them, and for them.

In conclusion, one needs to realise that nothing beats being with the right person, whether in a marriage or in a relationship; someone who wouldn't make you regret any action taken in love and as an expression of how genuinely you care about them.

Hopefully, everyone reading this finds that kind of comforting and reassuring kind of love.