There's this girl I met while on IT and she started from the onset to show signs of interest. She greets me all the time, calls my name always, compliments me (without reserve), and just shows keen interest. But I didn't start to reciprocate because I'm slow at this relationship thing. By the time I started having feelings for her and wanting to do stuff with her, she was through with her training and left.
Relationship Talk With Bukky: She blows hot and cold with me; it's really confusing!
Dear Bukky,
So I tried to keep contact with her via WhatsApp and calls, because she told me one day before she left that I don't chat her up. The problem is that she takes a lot of time to reply texts, and I don't like it. I made her know that and she just picked up a little and dropped almost immediately. I just continued hoping she would get better.
Our chat is boring, and that is on her, because she would give one or two word replies days after I texted her. I kept wondering if maybe it was that she already lost interest given the time it took me to pick up. I try to ask her for her hobbies, to see if I can spice things up the more. I have also tried to tell her to be more lively, and such, but I could as well be urging a snail to run. So, I tried ignoring her too, because that's what I thought she was doing. But out the blue she'll send texts like, "my love, sweet heart, my heart, LOML, hun".
I would think she's back to life and reply, only for her to go back to her old self. I just think I've had enough of that and would want to stop texting and calling and trying to keep in touch. I don't want to go to the extent of deleting her number or blocking her off, because it might look rude. I sincerely think she is playing games and taking me for a fool. I'm not one. Although I kinda think I've done enough with her for someone to label me a fool.
One more thing is her secrecy. It's mind blowing. Only on Whatsapp, everything is hidden. I don't even get to know when she is online. I mean, I never see her online and she will post updates and ignore my texts and after a week or so, she'll send LOML. I'm not begging her to stay or chat, but I'm not sure of those "titles" she gives me on occasion. It is supposed to make me happy normally, but it infuriates me, maybe that's what it's meant for. Or am I not getting it?
_________
Dear reader,
Obviously this is just some sort of game with her, and you look like the one who is taking things a little too seriously. Yes, the signs sometimes look like interest, but it is not interest. She’s either just being herself [in a ridiculous problematic way] or she's outrightly just playing with you.
There are women who do this. It is all part of a little game to them. They do things that mislead you into thinking they might be interested in having something with you, but they do not intend to follow through with any intimate interpretation you may give to their actions.
If anything, I need you focus on the things that are annoying rather than the occasional sweet things she does to further confuse you.
My definitive answer to you would be to take your mind off this one. All the emotional roller-coaster is only happening on your end. She does not think too much of you. She’s just catching trips. Actually, this could be intentionally or intentionally. She could be doing this with the hope that you know she’s only messing with you.
Whichever the case, you need to put up a barrier between you and her. If her actions bother you this much and disturb your peace of mind, then you must shut it all out.
That is one thing you owe yourself.
_________________
Do you want to talk about your love life, marriage or family issues? Do you have burning questions that you would love to get answers to?
Just send a mail containing your question and location to relationships@pulse.ng, and I'll provide the most honest answers to them anonymously.
So, why not send that mail today and let's talk about it? A problem shared is a problem half-solved!
JOIN OUR PULSE COMMUNITY!
Eyewitness? Submit your stories now via social or:
Email: eyewitness@pulse.ng