Are you in a celibate relationship if you're having oral sex?

What is acceptable and what is not?

Are you in a celibate relationship if you're having oral sex?

Is there some middle ground to be found between innocuous kissing and mind blowing cunninglingus/fellatio?

To fully appreciate the extent of the seriousness of your decision to practice celibacy in your relationship, you first have to understand what the concept itself is about.

Celibacy means not being sexual in any way with others. It is as simple as that.

Every definition you’ll find of the concept points to this simple, straightforward interpretation of the concept.

It needs to be said here that a decision to be celibate should never be derided by anyone.

That someone engages in sex for so long does not negate the potency or validity of a new-found conviction to stay off it for whatever length of time someone chooses.

Of course most celibate relationships around these parts are mostly tied to religion and home training, but there are also people whose decision to stay off every sexual contact have nothing to do with those two.

It means absolute abstinence; or as Patoranking melodiously puts it in that his 2017 jam “no kissing eh, no touching eh…”

There can be no middle ground with celibacy. Masturbation is a no no. Fondling is unacceptable. Oh, and oral sex is certainly prohibited.

You are either in it or not. If you and your partner are kissing, making out, deep petting each other, I’m sorry to be the one to break it to you, hun, but that is not a celibate relationship.

If you are staying off penetrative sex but occasionally give or get head with any form of regularity, you are not in a celibate relationship. If you are having anal sex, you are also not in a celibate relationship.

Sure, you are not going all the way; of course you are not engaging in sex in the real sense of it but you see that celibacy thing, just come off it.

You are absolutely not in a celibate relationship if you are having or giving oral sex.


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