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Relationship Talk Talking to ladies is difficult for me

I'm always very shy and usually don't know what to say.

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I usually can't find my voice with women around. play

I usually can't find my voice with women around.


Dear Bukky,

Please I don't know how to chat/talk to girls I really like so that they’d feel the same way about me.

I'm always very shy and don't usually know what to say.

Please I need help. Thank you.

Hi, reader

I get this a lot and it always surprises me because as far as I am concerned, it is really not as hard as it is, except you make it so for yourself.

First I think you need to stop trying to talk to girls so “they’ll feel the same way about you”. It has to begin by knowing her, being friends with her, asking questions, telling her about yourself, learning about her… all that stuff.

That’s the way to do it.

See, women are not all snubs. Ladies that want friends and partners just as much as you do.

All they need from you is to approach respectfully, be yourself, be engaging, consistent and once you guys start talking, the possibility of a romantic relationship shoots up.

But first, you have to talk. And to make this easy for yourself, you need to read, be knowledgeable about a myriad of subjects, stay aware of what’s happening around you. You need to know stuff.

Also, go out. Join groups, meet people. Even if you are shy to talk to people, there’s a chance that someone will initiate a conversation with you!

Being in places where there are loads of young people creates that possibility for you.

But then again, you’ll also need to intentionally make yourself walk up to people, introduce yourself, have conversations and just… interact and relate.

Do I need to mention that grooming, appearance, politeness and respect for women matter?

Of course you should know that already.

If you get intentional about doing these things, you’ll be surprised at the great things that’ll happen.
Do you want to talk about your love life, marriage or family issues?

Do you have burning questions that you would love to get answers to?

Just send a mail,  include your location and detail your issues to relationships@pulse.ng.

I'll provide the most honest answers to them anonymously.

So, why not send that mail today and let's talk about it?

A problem shared is a problem half-solved!

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