Why You Shouldn't Do Office Romance (Even If It’s Been Destined by the Heavens)

You may have fantasised about a passionate kiss in the elevator or about getting into it in a secret corner of the office, with no surveillance cameras, with your work crush. Maybe you want the subtle forms of affection, like them getting you lunch or helping you level up at work. 

But the truth is, office romance is messy. It does more harm than good, takes your already non-existent sanity for a wild spin and farts on it. Now, I do not have any experience in this department, but proximity breeds chaos. I also believe that while experience is the best teacher, you should always sit in other people’s classrooms and learn from their teachers instead. 

Now, people have strong opinions about office romance. In an opinion piece about dating your coworkers, some said it’s completely normal (adults spend most of their lives at work, so of course relationships will happen there…including affairs). Others said it’s the fastest way to ruin your peace, your job, and your reputation in one sweep.

And the truth is, office romance isn’t always black and white. Like David’s parents, some people meet at work and go on to build beautiful lives together. It happens. But for many others, what starts as something exciting and harmless slowly becomes complicated in ways they didn’t see coming.

Read Next: 5 ways to make your office romance work 

Because no matter how romantic it feels at first, the workplace isn’t a place for love. It’s designed for performance, structure, hierarchy, and results.

And once feelings enter that kind of space, things can get messy pretty fast. Here’s why you should think twice before dating (or doing it with) a coworker.

Work comes with enough emotional stress on its own: deadlines, pressure, competition, and office politics. Romance adds another layer.

You’re thinking about tone, observing their interactions with other women/men in the office, gauging their expressions, and deciphering their intent. You find yourself asking: 

• Why did they sound cold in that message?

• Was that feedback professional or personal?

• Why are they acting differently today?

Suddenly, your workplace becomes emotionally stifling. And it’s hard to stay focused when your heart is clocked in too. You want to constantly be around them, yapping about everything and nothing. 

Read Next: If She Says These 9 Things on a First Date, You Might Want to Leave Early 

There’s no difference between office romance and a reality show. Your colleagues are your audience, and they notice more than you think. The awkwardness after a small fight, the way you subtly defend each other in meetings, the tension after a jealous moment, the way you always find each other…

Even if nobody says anything, the atmosphere shifts.

Read Next: What's the Difference Between a Sociopath and a Narcissist? 

Even if you’re on the same level, office relationships often come with an imbalance. Someone gets promoted. Someone has influence. Someone’s opinion suddenly matters more.

If you’re not on the same level, you start wondering if they genuinely like you or what you represent and if you can say no without consequences.

This is what people rarely think about. Breakups are already painful. But breakups are worse when you still have to sit across from each other, work on the same team, attend the same meetings, and pretend everything is fine.

There’s no real space to heal. No clean break. Just you, your feelings, and Monday morning check-ins. Not even your worst enemy deserves that.

Read Next: Fallen Out of Love With Your Partner? Here’s What to Do 

In many workplaces, especially where gossip moves faster than emails, dating a coworker can become your headline.

You become the one dating the line manager, and the couple is always whispering.” It could even cause some stir among your team members if they perceive favouritism. 

It doesn’t matter if you’re the most competent team member. That perception becomes a shadow. And perception can be unfair, but it can also be powerful, depending on how you wield it.

Read Next: 7 People on What Their Exes Did for Work and the Careers They’d Never Date Again 

Love is beautiful, yes. But work is also where you’re building stability, independence, and identity. Office romance can cost you your peace, your focus, and your credibility. And sometimes even your job.

You should also know that sometimes, what feels like love is really just lust built on the foundation of closeness plus convenience. 

Read Next: Are You In A Situationship Or A Friends-With-Benefits-Ship? 

A lot of office romance is built on context. You only know each other in “work mode”. You haven’t seen them fully outside that environment in real-life stress, family dynamics, personal values, or long-term intimacy.

The office can create chemistry. But chemistry does not equal compatibility.

Aside from the fact that single people need to breathe, love really should be soft and uncomplicated. You shouldn’t have to hide, manage, or explain it under HR policies and office tension.

Office romance isn’t always wrong; some people make it work, yes. But it is often riskier than people admit; it becomes a lesson wrapped in deep regret.