How to Spice Up Your Relationship This Christmas

A lot of noise accompanies Christmas in Nigeria. There’s traffic, family visits, chicken that must be killed, Detty December paparazzi and expectations flying around. In the middle of all that, it’s easy for romance to take the back seat. But if you’re intentional, this season can actually bring you closer.

Forget matching pyjamas; here are a few great ideas to help spice up your relationship (or marriage) and deepen your intimacy this Christmas. 

Before you both travel to your homes or everyone starts showing up unannounced, create a day that belongs to just the two of you.

Take a day off. Stay indoors. Order food or cook together. Wear something comfortable but attractive. Play music. Talk. Nap. Touch. Laugh.

This kind of intentional isolation helps you reset emotionally and physically before the exhaustion and excitement of the season drain you both.

If you search online for Christmas gift ideas for couples, you will find many recommendations for personalised gifts, but gifts don’t always have to be material. Sure, material gifts are great; they’re like keepsakes that keep memories alive and fresh. 

But understanding your partner deeply is the key to giving a great gift: knowing what they need at the moment and what makes them happy. If your partner is a 9-5er, a staycation where they can unwind without work or family pressure might get you a 10/10 score over a customised piece of jewellery or a Miu Miu bag. 

To choose between an experiential and material gift, consider your partner’s needs and how the year has treated them so far.

Read Next: 9 Experiences to Gift Instead of a Thing 

Who says dates have to happen outside? There’s too much happening outside, and you both may have attended many, but indoor date nights are where intimacy is rekindled. To get your cosy indoor dinner date idea right, you must set the mood:

• Low lights or candles

• Soft music

• Phones away

• Intentional conversation

Read Next: 10 Scented Candles to Set the Mood for a Romantic Indoor Date 

You don’t need matching pyjamas or a professional photoshoot to feel connected. Create small, personal Christmas traditions:

• Cooking Christmas food together (even if one person is just supervising or serving ‘tea’)

• Watching old Nollywood classics or your favourite Christmas movies

• Exchanging handwritten notes instead of expensive gifts

• Share wishes, goals, or intentions for the next year on the eve of Christmas. 

These little rituals give your relationship something to look forward to every year, and that emotional anticipation is powerful.

Sometimes, what a relationship needs isn’t a deep conversation but laughter. Adulthood can be exhausting, so take a chill pill and have fun.

Play games. Dare each other. Share fantasies, jokes, and memories. Dance together in the living room. Be silly. Be flirtatious. Reserve the seriousness for the oversabi (know-it-all or excessive) aunties and uncles at home.

Surprises don’t have to be grand. A sticky note with a loving message, a little gift left in their pocket or bag, or a DIY couple-themed advent calendar with small treats, love notes, or mini experiences can bring a smile to your partner’s face and make them feel cherished.

Read Next: Fun, Affordable Things to Do at Home Together (Beyond Netflix)

Coordinating outfits, even subtly, can be a fun way to show unity and get into the holiday spirit. Whether it’s matching sweaters or socks, it adds a playful touch to everyday moments.

Host a themed Christmas night just for the two of you. Get into your fantasies and play them out. 

Taking care of each other rolls quality time and acts of service into one. It deepens your bond and intensifies your love for each other. Help them with a task, cook for them…

Holidays can be hectic, and family drama can drive you to the edge. Make time to listen, reassure, and support each other through the chaos. 

Read Next:  The Gentle Art of Guiding Your Partner Through Sex (Without Killing the Mood) 

Romance doesn’t have to be expensive. I mean, this is Nigeria, after all; the economy is not smiling at anyone, but spicing things up doesn’t mean draining your account balance in December.

These simple and thoughtful gestures still hit:

1. Christmas Dare Cards: Write fun, suggestive dares (long kisses, slow dances, stripping).

2. Secret Santa for Each Other: Anonymous notes, surprises, or flirty clues throughout the day.
   

3. Holiday Massage Night: Warm oils, soft music, dim lights, and slow and intentional touch.

4. Dress-Up Surprise: Festive but alluring outfits, something that makes you feel confident and irresistible.

5. Slow Dance at Home: favourite songs, close embrace, no phones, no emergencies.

6. Desire Letters: Write what you love most about them, emotionally and physically.

7. Future Fantasies: Share dreams you have together, travel, moments, and experiences.

8. “I’ve Never Told You This” Game: Creates space for safe, honest confessions that deepen intimacy.

9. Late-night wine by candlelight, just the two of you.

10. Movie Night with Rules: Sit close, no distractions, and cuddling is encouraged.

Read Next: Top 20 Date Night Movies Couples Will Actually Love 

11. Morning-After Breakfast: Cook together slowly, still wrapped in the warmth of the night before.

12. Love Coupons: “Redeem for a kiss,” “Redeem for a massage,” “Redeem anytime”

13. Cute Surprises: A handwritten note, a scent you love, or something soft or silky.

14. Countdown to Midnight: Build anticipation all evening with eye contact, touches, and smiles.

15. Experience gifts: Plan a couple’s spa day, cooking class, wine tasting, or weekend getaway.

16. Memory jar: Write favourite moments from the year and read them together on Christmas night.

17. 12 Days of Christmas (Couples Edition): Small daily surprises—notes, kisses, favours, or mini dates.

18. Laugh together: Watch cheesy Christmas movies or share embarrassing childhood holiday stories.
    

19. Year-end heart-to-heart: Talk about what you appreciated most about each other this year.

20. Gratitude exchange: Write letters expressing love, admiration, and growth.

Christmas is more than jollof and chicken and decorations. It’s a chance to reconnect, laugh, and create lasting memories with your partner. From thoughtful surprises to cosy nights and playful adventures, these thoughtful and intimate ideas can infuse excitement and love into your relationship. Embrace the season, focus on your connection, and make this Christmas one you’ll both cherish forever.