Tested by Fire: Popular Nigerian pastors who lost their children

Losing a child is one of the deepest pains a parent can experience, it is a tragedy that leaves a permanent mark on the soul.

For two of Nigeria’s most respected pastors, Enoch Adeboye and Uma Ukpai, this tragedy was not just a personal loss but also a test of their faith, strength, and resilience. This grief ignored their titles, status, influence, and spiritual calling.

These deaths were not just family moments hidden behind closed doors; they were public. It also shook the faith of their followers, who wondered why God would allow his servants to go through such an ordeal.

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But their experiences are not isolated. Some pastors have lost their wives to death as well, and even in the Bible, some of God’s most faithful servants were tested through unimaginable loss. Job, described as blameless and upright, lost all his children in a single day, yet still declared, “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.”

King David also mourned the death of his infant son, weeping and fasting, before rising again to worship the same God who allowed the child’s passing. In much the same way, these Nigerian pastors weathered their storms and years later, they continue to preach, pray, and serve the very God who "permitted" their tragedies.

Nigerian Pastors Who Lost Their Children

Pastor Enoch Adeboye

In May 2021, Pastor Enoch Adeboye, General Overseer of the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG), lost his third child, Pastor Dare Adeboye. Dare, aged 42, passed away in his sleep while serving as a pastor in Eket, Akwa Ibom State. The news sent shockwaves across Nigeria and the Christian community.

Dare had conducted a church programme on Tuesday when he came back home and did not wake up from sleep. Pastor Dare Adeboye, popularly known as ‘Pastor D,’ was regarded as one of the most influential youth pastors in the RCCG.

Some of his previous roles in RCCG included a senior pastor at RCCG House of Praise in Birmingham, England, and provincial pastor at RCCG Kaduna 1. His last position was the church’s north central youth evangelist overseeing Niger, Benue, Kwara, Kogi, Nasarawa, Plateau, and FCT.

In April 2022, at the Holy Ghost Service, Pastor Enoch Adeboye, who owns one of the richest churches in Nigeria, shared how he got over his deep sorrow caused by the death of his son, Dare. He said:

When I lost my son last year (2021), then I was deeply in sorrow, I got a text (message) from one of my (spiritual) daughters that suddenly turned the tide. What she wrote was simply this: Daddy, let God carry you.

Adeboye disclosed that some people laughed at him when he was in the saddest period of his life. He described the loss of his son as the darkest moment of his life since becoming a Christian. In 2025, still reflecting on his profound loss, Adeboye explained that it was in this dark moment that he found solace in the steadfast faith of Rev. Uma Ukpai, who had also endured personal tragedies but continued to serve God unwaveringly.

Adeboye said that despite his own grief, Ukpai’s example inspired him to keep moving forward in faith. He said:

I had to preach on Friday, and one reference point that gave me strength was Uma Ukpai. I know he lost more than one child in a day, yet he did not waver. He kept on serving God. He gave me strength at a time when I needed it most.

Dare is survived by his wife, Temiloluwa, and three children

Rev. Uma Ukpai

Reverend Uma Ukpai, a renowned evangelist and president of Uma Ukpai Evangelistic Ministries, lost two of his children in a tragic car accident in 1985. What made the event even more heartbreaking was that it occurred shortly after God had revealed to him that such a trial would come, and that He would not intervene.

In a 2009 interview with Vanguard, Uma Ukpai said he was fasting for seven days when a man saw him, stopped him and said, "You are going to be a preacher, you are going to have eight children, but two will die in a motor accident."

Two months before he lost his children, he said God had spoken to him and told him, "Uma I won’t answer your prayers. I want to test you and know how you love me." On their way to a crusade in their village, the driver carrying his children and a cousin, drove into a river.

I attempted to bring the children out, not knowing that my wife also jumped into the river behind me, and the water carried her, threw her up six times. It was the seventh time that somebody called my attention to her. I used one hand to swim and the other to hold her, and brought her to shore. I rescued the children later. They had died because a child can stay underwater only for two minutes. I put them in a car to pray for them, but an oncoming car from the opposite direction drove into the car and smashed it. The bumper flew out, and the bonnet flew out. I stopped and I was pacing up and down, not knowing what to do next.

Like the story of Job, while he was still processing the accident, somebody ran to him to tell him that the 50-seater bus carrying his band had caught fire. He was not sure how many people died in the accident. He said:

I was composed because God had warned me. I didn't make those children. God gave them to me. All that I had, now have and will ever have is given by God. And His will is supreme.

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He further added that he still proceeded to the crusade venue to preach. According to him, his thoughts, resolution and strength in that moment were:

If God, over the years, protected us and decided to lower the hedge one day, why should I protest? So, I marched on!

His unwavering faith in the midst of that tragedy became a source of inspiration for many, including Pastor Adeboye, who credits Ukpai’s example as one of the reasons he found the strength to carry on after his loss.

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For both Pastor Adeboye and Rev. Ukpai, the loss of their children is a reminder that even spiritual giants are not exempt from life’s deepest sorrows. But through their pain, they’ve continued to lead, inspire, and preach a gospel that offers comfort to countless others in grief.

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