'I had no idea I would marry a superstar' — Kunle Remi’s wife, Tiwi, opens up on leaving social media

• She explained why she decided to take a break from social media

• She advises people to be intentional about social media.

• Says social media should be driven by purpose, not pressure.

Speaking on her new YouTube channel, Bare by Bko, Tiwi explained how stepping away from social media helped her rediscover herself and prepare for the life she now lives.

The channel, according to her, is focused on unpacking identity, relationships, motherhood and womanhood.

Explaining why she initially disappeared from social media, she said, “So the big response for why I was not on social media was that I had no idea who I was and what I was meant to be contributing for other people and therefore, I didn’t feel like being online and using my influence in a lukewarm way was enough to justify spending so much time on an app. I also didn’t know at the time that God was cleaning out my digital footprint because of the person I was going to marry. I had no idea I was going to marry this superstar that had such a strong public image with limited controversy, if anything at all, and the kind of wife that was needed to show up in that space was not one that was all over the place, unclear and attention seeking. I met my husband and understood the reason why there was a need to be off for a restart.”

Tiwi admitted that before taking a break from social media, she enjoyed the attention she received online and became intentional about curating a certain image.

According to her, she often shared revealing photographs because of the validation and reactions they attracted.

She said, “The pictures I would post were the ones that were more revealing showing off legs and upper body area. I liked the kind of attention that it was giving at the time.”

She further explained that Instagram gradually became more than just a social platform for her.

“I also knew the more pictures I was putting out of myself that got the thumbs up and likes required, perhaps less and less clothing. At one point, I was using Instagram as a dating app. I loved when my DMs were lit. And because of that, I thought that one day, when I got married, I didn’t want to explain a lot of stuff. That was my third ‘what was I doing online moment.”

Tiwi revealed that she later deleted many of her old pictures and struggled with remaining active online, especially because social media was not bringing financial benefits.

“Eventually, I decided to get off the app and be ok with what’s in front of me,” she said.

She added that after leaving social media, LinkedIn became the only platform she actively used.

“I have just lived this life where, unless you can find me on LinkedIn, that’s it. I am not on any social media channels except for LinkedIn. I don’t have a burner page, and I don’t have the apps on my personal phone, so if I have to get on Instagram or TikTok, I will have to go on my husband’s phone when he is home or available, and his phone is not in use. I am not a scroller. I am usually looking for something specific, and that’s it.”

Speaking on her return to social media, Tiwi explained that she now has a clearer sense of purpose and wants to use her influence positively.

“I am back now using it for Bare because Bare is a clear assignment for a clear community, and I wanna grow with it. As of May 7, when I was recording this, I was not on any social media platform, and that could change personally and also for Bare. I wanted to use my influence for good and don’t want to be lukewarm.”

She also advised people not to rush into social media without understanding their purpose for being there.