Why first dates are terrifying and how to have a great first date

Anyone who is single and searching will tell you that first dates are scary. There's the anxiety of getting to meet someone for the first time, what should you say or do?

There’s the planning of the actual date, you two must be involved in planning the date, and you shouldn’t let one person do it. You both want to do something you love and are comfortable with, pitch ideas to each other and see what works. 

After planning a date, you have to solve logistics and costs. Where is it located? Is everyone paying for themselves? If it’s important to the woman that the man pays, talk about it. Ask if he or she has a budget. 

Getting to meet the person. No matter how the conversation was online, an actual physical conversation is scarier, you get to know who the person really is.

Most people also simply don’t know how to act when they meet someone for the first time, however, the entire atmosphere is filled with so many expectations that you might ruin your chance with them.

A basic rule of thumb is never to take first dates too seriously and never say too much. No one needs to know that you used to be a drug addict or that your boyfriend cheated on you with your best friend. 

It’s a precarious line, you don’t want to overexpose, yet you shouldn’t be mute.

One of the best ways to keep the conversation moving is by talking about things that are currently happening e.g how your day or week went, an event that happened at work or school, a show you are currently watching, or your views on recent happenings.

These topics will keep everything light, but telling someone you just met how your father left you when you were 10, and you’ve never felt love might be too much for them to handle.

Lastly, look at the positives. If you go out on many dates, you can be overly critical of people.

So, take a step back and appreciate their good qualities, listen to what they are saying and try to have fun, don’t bog yourself down by wondering if they are the one for you or not, be present in the moment and have fun.