Relationship Talk My man remains so much in contact with his ex, I'm fed up

I don’t know because history repeats itself and when I tell him, he always says that this time around, things are different.

  • Published: , Refreshed:
Relationship Talk play

Relationship Talk

(Pulse)
24/7 Live - Subscribe to the Pulse Newsletter!

I’m a mother of two and expecting.

I’m with a guy who got me 6 months pregnant for my second baby girl. He was from a 5 year old breakup situation [when we met] and [I felt no qualms] as I got in.

He found his ex-girlfriend 2 months pregnant and he took that son as his own. But we have been fighting about her since being together for about 5 months being together.

She will be quiet for some time and the next thing [I know], she’ll start making call backs and calls talking about her child and that’s where things start to fail between us again.

This thing is happening repeatedly. What hurts the most is that, I’m carrying his first child and the lady is also pregnant with another man’s child.

She's not staying around but she is able to take my happiness away from me. I don’t know what to do anymore because the guy is telling me how much he loves me, how much his child means to him but when the lady starts to get involved, everything changes.

I don’t know because history repeats itself and when I tell him, he always says that this time around, things are different.

Then when I’m around he does not pick up her calls, does not reply her callbacks but when he’s gone, they talk in any way they want.

I don’t know what to do anymore because he’s even not good to my kids but I try to be with him because I feel like I can't live without him in my life.

When I tell him that I want nothing to do with him, he becomes so broken. Please help me. I love him and I don’t have interest in any other guy.

Because he knows that, he hurts me by doing the same thing.

Should I stay with him, maybe things will come around, or should I leave him? Because this time around, I do want to leave him for good because he even makes me regret having this child that I’m carrying.

The lady told me that she will never have his kids because he’s not working and he’s not sure about who he wants to be with; which was why she aborted his child and lied to him that she had a miscarriage.

Please help me.
_____________________

Hello,

Having read your mail like four times over, I really can't help but feel torn between anger and sadness.

If all you said is true, then the writing is on the wall - you should probably leave him; but it is never as simple as that, given how you are pregnant with a baby and the obvious love you confessed for him.

As much as these things are going to be heavy on your mind as you make your decision to either stay or go, you need to know that you deserve better than what you are getting. That much appears very obvious to me.

Taking another man's child from a woman you broke up with five years ago does not look like a sound decision to me, especially as it puts pressure on his relationship with you.

I do not even need to ask if he consulted/contacted you before doing that. The answer is apparent.

And the manner with which he allows the lady break in between you with such frequency is wrong, too.

I can go on and on listing the things that are not right about the way he treats you but the bottom line I think, based on the stuff you sent in that mail. you deserve a lot more better treatment than you are getting now.

I won't advise you leave him... yet. This is because of the coming baby and all that.

I think you should use the period before the birth of the child to see if any change occurs. Talk to him again about how you are fast approaching your breaking point.

Make him know how bad you feel about the way he treats you, and the way the other woman's presence stresses you.

I suggest you leave out the part where you get to leave him after the birth of the child if he does not change.

Just tell him what's on your mind and watch what happens till the birth of your baby.

I wish you the very best, and hope you have  a safe delivery.

-----------------

Do you want to talk about your love life, marriage or family? Send a mail to relationships@pulse.ng

Don't be left out, stay updated on relationship tips and advice.

Yours truly!

Do you ever witness news or have a story that should be featured on Pulse Nigeria?
Submit your stories, pictures and videos to us now via WhatsApp: +2349055172167, Social Media @pulsenigeria247: #PulseEyewitness & DM or Email: eyewitness@pulse.ng. More information here.