What is hate sex and why do people do it?

Hate sex sounds pretty conflicting, doesn’t it? Like, why would anyone want to be having coitus with someone they despise?

Hate sex what happens when you have intercourse with someone you have a dislike for you, or they for you, or an obvious, mutual dislike for each other. Whatever the source of the hate and antagonism, you both consent to sex and that existing tension is said to be what makes things more zesty and spicy for you both.

Actually, hate sex isn’t so much about ‘hate’ as it is about dislike. The term that describes the concept is ‘hate sex’ but it rarely has to do with hate in reality. “It might just be [sex with] an annoying colleague that you don’t like very much or an acquaintance who always manages to get under your skin,” according to Metro UK.

It's a little confusing but hating someone could also find outlet in angry sex. [Credit: Black Enterprise] Pulse Nigeria

It could be that horrible ex you can't stand, but who still wields such insane control over your body and how it responds to her.

Do bear in mind that while hate sex may take an aggressive form, like all other types of sex, it still needs to be fully consensual.

Having said that, is it OK to have hate sex?

Kate Moyle, a sex expert says that “hate sex, in short, is sex with someone you hate which can still be very passionate and for some people can offer a way of expressing emotions towards one another. The experience of arousal and adrenaline can make us feel charged up, which can be channelled into sex.”

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But it’s not so cool. “While it may be dressed up as finding someone you despise as sexually attractive, [hate sex] is abusive,” according to Pam Custer, a British counselor who runs a psychotherapy practice and specialises in relationship issues and couples counseling.

“Dominating through sex is not intimacy, nor is it mutually respectful,” she adds.

Angry sex is not the same as make up sex. [Credit: NBC News] Pulse Nigeria

Make up sex vs. Angry sex

The difference is in what people try to achieve with both actions. With makeup sex, existing partners try to get back together, to try and use sex as the concluding part of their reconciliation exercise.

On the other hand, angry sex is not geared towards any form of intimacy or done in an attempt to allow any emotional closeness between the two people.