Her family won't let me marry her unless I change my religion

Dear Bukky,

I am reaching out from Abakaliki. I and my girlfriend have dated for years now.

The issue now is that she is from a Muslim family and I am from a Christian family. We both want to end up with each other despite the religious difference though.

The uncle called me some time ago asking if I will be a Muslim for him to support the marriage. I agreed to but within me I know I can not be a Muslim and I really love her as well as she does.

What do I do or tell her now that her uncle has discussed with her about my decision and he’s now even sending me Arabic prayers??

Please be kind to advise me._______________

Dear reader,

No matter how far a lie has been allowed to grow, it still can never replace the truth. The truth remains the truth and that is exactly what you owe yourself and your woman.

To yourself be true and honest. So you know you cannot be a Muslim, say it to her!

I personally think you should not have lied to the uncle in the first instance because that will only make things more complex than they have to be. But that is done now and what is left for you to do is to try to correct what you’ve done.

Call your babe and tell her the truth. You want to be with her and she wants to be with you. If her family has an objection to that, it is her duty to make them see reason why her happiness is what should matter to them more than religious differences.

If your family has objections, it is your duty to make your family see things your way.

I also need to mention here that this is your cue to actually do better than you have always done and to treat that woman very well, with love and with all the affection possible. This is needed so you don’t justify her family’s rejection of you. You need them to judge you based on your personal character not for reason of your religion. If that’s the case, then that character has to be solid and on point. Of course, one way they’d judge that is in the way you treat their daughter with love respect and genuine care.

While your girl has the responsibility of convincing her folks to allow her marry you, don’t ruin her efforts by not being on point character-wise.________________Do you want to talk about your love life, marriage or family issues?

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