Despite the perceived purity or perfection in good girls, why do men seem to go for the bad girls?
But these days, good girls had better open their eyes because it is nothing new for a woman to go for what she wants when she wants it.
A bad girl is fearless when it comes to making the first move. She is not afraid to take risks. Whereas, a good girl just stays put and waits to be approached the traditional way or she would have to develop a smart tactic to tell her interest how she feels without coming across as desperate and saving herself the shame of rejection.
So while she is brainstorming over these very complex calculations, the bad girl plays her numbers game, throws any rejection out the window and moves on to the next two, three or ten guys until she finds the right one.
Read Also: Do good girls also finish last? [part i]
Men love the thrill that comes with drama, adventure and spontaneity. So some would even go for these girls who bring these forward attributes for their short-term escapades whilst they might very well be reserving the good ones for the future.
What they might not know is that they soon start to develop true emotions towards this bad girl, and end up popping the question, without thinking that they would have when their initial agenda was just to date for the fun roller coaster ride. After all by nature, human beings begin to develop emotions for each other when we spend a significant amount of time with another person.
On the other hand, good girls are thought to take themselves too seriously, and so may be viewed as boring.
During a conversation I had with a group of friends, the subject of relationships came up. We were talking about setting certain friends up with others who were searching for relationships. When the name of a particular girl came up, a male friend said, “She is too good…there is no one I could set her up with at the moment” At the time, I thought “What does that even mean?”
But, after going back to ask what he meant, he explained that men may not be interested in starting a relationship with this good girl because they have established that she may have high standards that they may not be able to meet, and would prefer to go for someone of (perceived) lower standards. That way, they don’t feel so pressured to live up to high expectations.
So what is the solution for good girls? Would taking one or two tips from the bad girl be wise advice?
Oyin Egbeyemi is an engineer-turned-consultant-turned-educationist, runner and writer.