ADVERTISEMENT

Tony Robbins explains how to bring up an awkward conversation every couple needs to have

Every couple needs to talk about money if they're going to succeed, says Tony Robbins.

Dive in, says Tony Robbins.

Tony Robbins began his campaign to spread personal finance knowledge a few years ago, when he saw that after the Great Recession people distrusted banks and the stock market and were largely ignorant of how their money works for them.

ADVERTISEMENT

And as he mentioned in a recent Facebook Live Q&A at Business Insider's New York offices, being educated about your own finances isn't enough if you're in a relationship.

In the Q&A, Robbins discussed principles from his new book "Unshakeable," a much slimmer version of his 2014 book "Money: Master the Game," with additional insights from Peter Mallouk, who was rated the No. 1 wealth adviser in the US by Barron's three times and who brought Robbins into his firm, Creative Planning, in 2016.

A viewer asked Robbins how she could begin a dialogue with her partner about each other's finances. She said it was difficult because her partner wasn't forthcoming.

ADVERTISEMENT

Robbins said a primary reason couples feel uncomfortable talking about their money with each other is that one or both sides are fearful of judgment that they won't trust.

"If you try to tell your partner things, and your partner loves you but doesn't think this is your expertise — and for most people, it's not their expertise" — then you're not going to make much progress, Robbins said. "You're much better off to educate yourself and then share your learnings. Don't say, 'Let's do this.' Just say, 'Gosh, look at this. I just learned this thing.'"

He's suggesting that to begin, it's smarter to start learning about money yourself, and then approach your partner with new facts and techniques you've learned in order to spark a conversation rather than issue a lecture.

If that's not working and there's still a level of distrust — it doesn't necessarily have to be ill-intentioned or patronizing — it can be assuaged by bringing in a mediator who presents information to you both. That way, fear on both sides begins to disappear.

It's why, Robbins said, that at Creative Planning, all married clients must bring their spouses to their first meeting with their adviser, to discuss separate and mutual goals.

ADVERTISEMENT

Robbins told the viewers that having a mediator for this potentially awkward conversation, whether through third-party knowledge or an actual adviser, is normal even for sophisticated investors. He likened it to the way a talented surgeon wouldn't perform surgery on himself.

"So having an outsider guide you through that is extremely helpful," Robbins said.

Watch the full Facebook Live Q&A with Robbins:

FOLLOW BUSINESS INSIDER AFRICA

Unblock notifications in browser settings.
ADVERTISEMENT

Recommended articles

How SafeHamsters unlocks the potential of crypto betting| Insider Tips

How SafeHamsters unlocks the potential of crypto betting| Insider Tips

A look into the diverse tax reforms being implemented across Africa

A look into the diverse tax reforms being implemented across Africa

Dubai firm to lend South Sudan $12.9 billion in exchange for 20 years oil repayment

Dubai firm to lend South Sudan $12.9 billion in exchange for 20 years oil repayment

China dethrones USA as the most influential global power in Africa: Report

China dethrones USA as the most influential global power in Africa: Report

Major African economies expecting inflation ease into next year, except Nigeria

Major African economies expecting inflation ease into next year, except Nigeria

10 African countries with the lowest price changes in household commodities

10 African countries with the lowest price changes in household commodities

Dangote refinery outranks Europe's 10 largest refining facilities

Dangote refinery outranks Europe's 10 largest refining facilities

Africa may just have the lowest level of cyber threats compared to other regions

Africa may just have the lowest level of cyber threats compared to other regions

A look into Kenya’s Shs1.1 billion climate funding from the UK

A look into Kenya’s Shs1.1 billion climate funding from the UK

ADVERTISEMENT