5 things ex VP wants you to know before he becomes president

Ok, just in case you’ve been under some huge rock, Atiku Abubakar has launched his 2019 presidential campaign in 2017.

Yeah, the man is that impatient about fixing Nigeria.

It will be the fifth time Atiku will be taking a shot at the Nigerian presidency. The man launched his presidential campaign in 1992, fellas---the year some of my readers were still in their diapers or hadn’t even been born!

Ok, I’m sorry…

Here are five things Atiku wants you to hold him to when he becomes president in 2019:

1. Atiku says he’ll fight corruption so bad, you’ll be so pleased and shocked all at once.

“I’ll fight corruption like never before if given the opportunity to preside over the affairs of this country. I’ll shock everyone because I believe I’ll fight corruption like never before”, Atiku said during a facility tour of the new ultra-modern Yaliam Press Ltd in the Jabi area of Abuja.

2. Atiku is tired of people labelling him corrupt.

The former VP is sick and tired of everyone saying he’s corrupt…bla….bla..bla….so, he goes:

“It is sickening to continue to regurgitate allegations of corruption against me by people who have failed to come forward with a single shred of evidence of my misconduct while in office".

3. Atiku says if you think he’s corrupt, come forward with some hard evidence or shut your trap already.

“People who are bereft of ideas about entrepreneurial spirit always think that everyone else is a thief just like them”, Atiku says.

Oh blimey!

4. The man says even if he’s a thief, he ain’t the only thief out there.

“If Atiku is a thief merely because of his resourcefulness and successful investments, my political enemies should tell Nigerians the sources of their own stupendous wealth.”

5. Atiku says he’s only called a thief by people who can’t point to anything they’ve built or any business theyve run.

People who are bereft of ideas about wealth creation, Atiku says, “always assume that a man cannot build himself without stealing.

“People who are bereft of ideas about entrepreneurial spirit always think that everyone else is a thief just like them,” he added for emphasis.

ALSO READ: Atiku launches presidential campaign two years early, grab a chair

“Despite previous desperate efforts to link me with corruption, the William Jefferson trial in the United States ended in 2009 without indicting me or linking me to corrupt activities,” he said.

Your thoughts?