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Relationships and Dating 7 reasons why women sometimes choose emotionally-unavailable men

You might be deceived into thinking only men enter into relationships to just 'chill', but women do, too, and here are reasons why.

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A close look at the behavioural pattern of young men will most likely reveal one thing- many want female companionship, but not the commitment that comes with it.

Young men, and even some that are not-so-young will often open themselves to the idea of having a chic to roll with, go on dates with, do 'couples' things' with, but at the mention of commitment, they step back and shy away.

On the other hand, women are more associated with long-term dating and would most times not go into a relationship without the promise of commitment and a shot at a lifetime of happiness.

But of course, there is always an exception to the rule.

play Why women sometimes choose emotionally-unavailable men (Shutterstock)


Women sometimes buck that social trend, and decide to enter into relationships even when they know there is little or no chance that anything permanent will result from it.

Here are seven reasons why they do that:

1. You were once too emotional

If you have once been open to love and committed to its working but got burnt as a result, it won’t be surprising if you agree to date someone who is not really into the commitment game.

ALSO READ: Here are evidence that you are settling for less in your relationship

Why? You are not willing to invest too much emotion into anyone or any relationship just yet, too.

play You do not want to give up your sexual freedom yet (Madamenoire)

2. Need to be sexually free

Men may crave sexual freedom more, but certain women like to keep their options open, too.

Women who fall into this category will hate to see their options limited because they are emotionally bound to just one guy.

So, best thing to do is to get a man who is just as unwilling to commit as them.

3. Disordered life

These women do not even really know what they want from life yet, so their choice in relationships can’t be expected to really be the best, right?

play Maybe you were once too emotionally involved and got burnt badly (Madamenoire)


4. Self esteem issues

Until you really love yourself, you really won’t expect anybody else to.

It’s just as simple as that. So, you are not looking for a guy to love you like the movies portray it. You just need someone… anyone would do.

ALSO READ: Long-term relationships negatively affect women's sex-drive, research shows

5. Career-obsessed

play Your career is too important to you (Madamenoire)

Career driven women who have little or no time for anything else are also very capable of this.

Some of them just appreciate the knowledge that they have someone. They do not expect to be called every second, neither do they expect to go on dates every now and then, they might not even have time to see their 'lover' for long stretches of time.

Which kind of man will agree to such thing except one who is emotionally-unavailable himself?

6. You are unsure about marriage

Do I want to get married? Do I not want to?

You really are not sure of this answer; so instead of dating someone who is emotionally available and ready to walk the walk, you instead plump for someone who is just as unsure as you.

play Uncertainty about the whole marriage scheme (Madamenoire)


7. Still crying over a past relationship

Is there someone you’re not quite over yet? Then, of courseyou date an emotionally unavailable man. Someone  who won’t really put pressure on you to get over the memory of your previous relationship.

This occurs with women who wish to appear as if they have moved on when they really have not.

If people are not really ready to invest their emotions into a relationship, when why get into one, you may be tempted to ask.

The answer is this; human beings need other humans. And the mental need to have someone to call your own sometimes supercedes rational judgement. It is quite inexplicable; but it is what it is.

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