My girlfriend's mum hates the sight of me

Dear Bukky,

I have been in a relationship for two years and noticed that my girlfriend's mum does not like me at all. My girlfriend told me not to bother about her mum but I have tried everything possible to make her like me but it's not working.

Recently she told my girlfriend that she does not want to see me at their place anymore. I love this girl so much but I am really confused on what to do.___________

Dear reader,

I think you should first understand why she does not like you. Ask your girlfriend if she has any idea why her mum despises you so much. She should know, I think. And if she doesn’t you need to set her on an inquest into knowing why. Until that is known, I don’t think there’s much you can do.

If it happens that she does not like you for something you can change, I think that’d be easy. All you need do [obviously] is work on the character flaw and that should be the end.

If the dislike is baseless though, you may have a bigger issue to deal with. At that point, I think you should just gauge how important her mum is on her decision-making process. If you intend to go all the way with her, do you think her mum’s refusal will be a problem, or can the marriage continue without it? If her father can consent to it, and your girl is truly willing to be with you, it should be a matter of time before her mother comes around, too.

I also think that regardless of what happens or whatever the case may be, your girl owes you the duty of calming her mum down and telling her how her unnecessary dislike affects her relationship with you.

If she can’t do that, maybe she’s not really serious about you as you are about her._________________

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