Dear Bukky,

Why does it feel like the love is waxing cold? Most times she asks me if I still love her but I pretend to say yes [even though I really don’t feel like that]

The question is do I still love her? Or is it because we see each other a lot?________

Dear reader,

I think the mistake you are making is in believing that love is in a feeling or that affection towards a person can be determined by the things you feel in the pit of your stomach towards them.

While this can be true at times, it is not and will never be conclusive evidence of anything. If you love someone, you may not always feel like it. It will not always be the way they project in TV  and in those romantic books and movies.

Love is not always a feeling. It is a responsibility most of the time. It is something you decide to do and consciously keep at it regardless of butterflies in your stomach or not.

So to the question of loving your partner, I think the things you feel or do not feel might not be the best way to judge that.

Love is way deeper, and more expansive than that.


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