Breaking up is one of the hardest things to do but heres how you can break-up maturely and if not walk away with a partner, at least walk away with a friend.
A break up can be awful especially if you're on the receiving end. It can leave you feeling confused, insecure and depressed. However, being the 'breaker upper' can be just as hard. Your mind is all over the place, wondering if you're doing the right thing or not.
A certified relationship coach, shares his five best tips for breaking up with someone properly and as maturely as possible. That's without being unnecessarily nasty, while also getting to the point and ensuring that you can walk away feeling like you've not only done the right thing but might be able to salvage a friendship from it all.
1. Be clear
People only wish to break up with someone if the person is no longer a match to their outlook, values, passions, needs and desires. So before the break up, write a list of what it is that you no longer want to be, feel or experience in a relationship so that you can be clear when you break up.
Then write down what you now want, and visualise it.
2. Fall out of love in your mind first
It’s harder to break up if you keep focusing on the one moment you were happy. If you're trying to build the strength to break up with a partner, banish that thought.
Focus on the top five negative moments of your relationship. Remember what you saw, heard and felt during those times. Keep repeating the process.
3. Be kind, but strict
Breaking up can be extremely painful, not just for the person being left behind but for the person doing the leaving. Be kind and respectful as you begin to distance yourself, however be strict with your boundaries because if you're not totally clear, your partner may get mixed signals and end up staying around much longer.
4. Figure out how valuable they are
Only you can decide what your partner is worth to you. Are they worth a sit down dinner or a five-minute coffee break up? Are they worth a four-word text or one last night of passion? Sorry but only you can decide that one.
5. Look forward
Think about all of the things you are now free to be, do after breaking up. Go on a rampage of thoughts that activate happy vibes. Tomorrow’s experiences are always created from the thoughts you are thinking today.