Pulse First Love is a weekly series that captures the emotions people felt, and the motions they went through the first time they tried being in a relationship.
This is the #FirstLove that happens when two innocent teenagers stumble into a love so beautiful without the tiniest clue of how to navigate the unromantic patches that most relationships experience. This is the 27th in this series of nostalgic stories. All the previous ones are HERE.
Tell me about the first time you wooed a babe
Lol. JSS 3. I wrote a letter to one stupid girl like that in JSS 2. Somehow the letter became a thing that got passed around their class and they were all laughing at me. It somehow got to my class as well. I was dragged with that thing for the longest time. LOL.
Tell me about the first person you fell in love with
LOL. Beyonce ooo. I wanted to die anytime I saw Beyonce on the screen then. I’m talking 2006, 2007-ish.
Lol. How about the one you loved that turned into an actual relationship?
One Yejide girl like that. I was 18 preparing for uni at the time. She was very pretty and quiet and you’d only see her whenever her folks sent her to get something. She used to be chaperoned [LOL] by her two little sisters. So I started saying hi, then tagging along on those errands and things just progressed from there.
What was the most memorable thing about this relationship?
I remember that she used to like Ne-Yo and Chris Brown a lot and we both had those colorful Nokia phones with which we shared music and made those long midnight calls. It was actually very nice. I’d go to her house and luckily for me, her mum and sisters liked me a lot. They thought I was a fine boy and used to say I looked cute and innocent. They really just let us be together with our privacy, and sometimes the mum would make meals and serve mine. But for the most part, she just used to encourage her daughter to be a good hostess to me and all. I think those times spent in her house were the best memories I have from that relationship. But I must mention that mummy only thought we were good friends. LOL. She didn’t know we were dating; neither did she know any other stuff that went down… both the good and bad.
But you guys must have faced certain stuff in the relationship, no?
Not really. At least none that I can remember. Mostly, it was just a lot of happy vibes.
So how did the breakup come about?
Uhm… so she had to go to school a few months before me. She went to a private uni so they sha resumed like 3 or maybe four months before I went to the state uni where I got admission at. You know how messed up these calendars can be.
So, yeah. Things started to go south once she began to acclimatize to the school environment and the demands of settling in. You know, all that stuff. That was how calls started to go unanswered, midnight calls became impossible, chats no longer flowed as they used to. And I used to get really pissed at those things so one night out of nowhere I just asked for us to break up.
Yeah. In hindsight that was stupid but hey, I was 18; the girl I liked seemed to be moving out of my grasp. That felt like the logical reaction at the time.
How did she react to that?
She started crying o. No. She actually hung up because I think she was tired and wanted to sleep. This is all vague now. It’s been so long lol. But the next time we spoke, she called me and was crying and begging for us to not end like that. She wanted me to give her some more time and that we could work it out and all.
I still liked her na. Me asking for a breakup was a frustrated response to not feeling as close to her as I used to. And part of it was also her fault. She didn’t help matters by not communicating as much.
Must have been overwhelming for her too - mixing the new environment with pleasing you
Bro. See, everything boils down to us being childish. LOL. We were young and foolish. There was nothing better communication and patience could not have sorted in that situation.
So you guys got back together...
Yeah. I was so happy but nothing really changed sha
So it became a cycle of communication failing, me breaking up with her in frustration and her begging me to give her a little more time. We must have repeated that pattern of breaking up and making up too many times for me to count.
In the end sha, we both moved on. I broke up with her one time and she just said OK and that was it.
Now that you’re older, what do you think you might have done differently in the relationship?
Like I said; patience and better communication would have solved our issues back then. So yeah, older me would have been more patient. I hope. LMAO.
Biggest lesson you took from that first love experience?
The friendship between us before things went south was mad. I don’t think it has been replicated with anyone else since her.
Would you date her now?
Ah, yes o. She’s still very pretty. You know, a more conscious, more rounded version of the beautiful woman that knocked me off my feet that year. But I don’t think I stand a chance with her anymore sha. LOL. I suspect that I already blew my chance.
E dey happen.
What is your love life like these days? Currently seeing anyone?
Two actually. LOL. I’m keeping my options open.
There's more where this came from. Get all First Love Stories here.