#PulseFirstLove is a weekly content series that captures the emotions people felt, and the motions they went through the first time they tried being in a relationship.
Pulse First Love: I realised how badly I wanted her when another guy came along
In an ironic way, it was a blessing to have another guy in the picture.
How does it feel to be at the risk of losing to a random sharp guy who has just arrived in town, and has plenty of plans for the woman of your dreams? The guy we spoke to for this #PulseFirstLove has an interesting story to tell on this. Read on below.
Can you tell me about your first-ever crush?
The first-ever one must have been in JSS3. My folks had just moved us to our new family home and we had to join a new school in the neighborhood, I and my two sisters. So we joined and the first that caught my attention was this girl in the first class they took me to. I was all of 12 at the time, mind you, but she looked so divine. Even at that age, I could tell. Sadly, the class teacher told them to take to the other class. So I ended up in 3A while she was in 3B.
And the crush died?
Die? How? LMAO. I spent the whole of my time in that school crushing on that girl. I mean there were others too along the line, but I never stopped crushing on her.
But nothing came out of it?
Nothing. Until I got to University and ran into her in my 3rd year.
Omo. Fate wanted you guys together so badly
LMAO. Fate missed the plot on that one then. Because by that time, I had fully and truly moved on from her. I mean, it was not even as if we stayed in touch after secondary school. All we had back then was just classmate vibes, nothing else. Oh, did I mention that we ended up being in Arts class together when we got to SSS1?
Well, you just did
Exactly. But then she started crushing on someone else. The guy didn’t even like her but I guess such is life - and especially with teenagers and stuff.
I agree. So you met her again in Uni
Yeah. By that time, I was completely different obviously. She was different, too. And I didn’t even find her older version attractive. We just bumped into each other a few times on campus before I graduated and that was that.
Tell me about your first love though. How did you guys meet?
In school. Interesting story. We met then towards the end of Pre-degree and stayed good friends up till we resumed 100L. When we got back, it was almost as if no time passed. We were still pretty close but I was still dragging my feet. It took some other guy’s interest for me to finally make the move.
Tell me about that experience vying for a woman’s attention with another man
Bruh, those were trying times for me. LOL. On a more serious note though, I guess it was just one of those situations where competition makes you get your shit together. To me, she was *Fareedah, whom I had become used to, whose beauty I had gotten used to, whose company and affection I had become certain of, even though I had not formally asked her to be mine. But to the other guy, this was someone new, he was dazzled - rightly so - and looked like he quickly wanted to do what I was dragging my feet on. And my babe seemed to be loving it too, not like I blame her sha. I stopped messing around and asked for us to put labels on what we had. It was a bit difficult to convince her but in the end, the better man won. LMAO.
Two questions: first, what do you mean by ' I stopped messing around' and how was it difficult to convince her?
I meant I was dragging my feet and I guess deep down, I was thinking that being in Uni would present better options than what was obtainable during PD days.
Men are scum
LMAO. I was young and silly, don't mind me. But that guy coming along just made it clearer to me what I really wanted. So in a way, I guess it was a blessing to have him in the picture.
Was that why you struggled to convince her to be your babe?
Yeah. I think she sensed it, too. I remember her saying she knew I was jealous of the other guy and that this sudden interest in making us official must be because of that.
There was a caught!
A big one oh. But of course, I flat-out denied it. In truth, she was the one for me and I admit that I would have regretted it if we never dated. I'm glad it didn't get to that.
Why do you say so?
There is some type of love we are meant to experience in a lifetime, or at least at different phases of our lives. I believe hers was the one for me at that time. I think it was the exact and perfect one I was meant to experience, not that other one you called fate the other time. I dare say we were actually beautiful together and everyone thought we were going to end up together for life. We were a departmental couple of the year once. LOL. And it's not like there weren't other amazing couples. People just loved our love, I guess. And it was not difficult to see why. We were such a cute couple.
What's the most memorable thing you remember?
We had this fun class trip that brought us to Lagos from Oyo state. It was two beautiful days on the beach, partying and just literally making memories. That stands out for me.
What now happened to you people?
We broke up eventually in our third year. Irreconcilable differences.
I'll rather not say. Sorry.
It's cool. Is there anything you'd do differently though?
LOL. I see what you're trying to do. But I would really rather not talk or give a clue about why we broke up.
LMAO. I don't know what you're talking about
Yeah right. To answer your question though, I think what I would have done differently would have been to make it formal earlier than I did. Shouldn't be waiting for another man to come show me how much a woman is worth to me.
I feel you. What's your love like these days?
In the hand of the Lord.
It's just in the hands of God oh, my brother. After having a few ending in tears, now it's anywhere God leads us we will go. Till then, we keep asking: 'God when?' on Twitter.
*Name changed for anonymity sake.
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