The Male Manual: What if she proposes?

This is an exclusive Pulse blog by writer, Folarin Okunola. "...Is this really some low key life-threatening situation that we can ONLY abide by? Is there a written law somewhere that says a woman can’t propose to you?..."

Silhouette of woman proposing to a man

Wait, don’t freak out. These things happen, let us not deceive ourselves. I know some of us may never experience it during our lifetime. Hell, I don’t even know anything about this. And that’s the point.

You see, I don’t want The Male Manual to be just a guy thing. So I decided that I wanted this weeks’ piece to be something that’s very focused on the ladies. This is no statement of facts just a couple of scenarios that have played out in my head. Essentially, this is my opinion on the matter.

Firstly, should she propose? Is it right for a woman to propose to a man? In the relationship, is doing that her place? Could such a woman be stark raving mad? Is such a woman part of the numerous problems holding back the rest of womankind? Well, the answer to this truly imposing problem is relative. Simple. However, I think there’s absolutely nothing wrong in a woman proposing to a man. Yes, traditionally speaking, that’s a ridiculous thing to say. But are you saying because she’s a woman she has no right to propose marriage to a man? Are you saying she has no right to ‘cuff’ her man? Are you saying that she should be content with just being ‘cuffed’? Think about it. I think a woman should be allowed to make her own decision, do the things she likes, and demand for what she wants, when she wants it – just like anyone else.

For those thinking ‘Oh, it’s disrespectful to a man.’ Well, you delusional jerks need to get your asses off that pedestal, accept the reality of what is, and think objectively for ourselves for a second. There’s nothing wrong in a woman proposing to you.  Let’s agree with the society and say that it is wrong for a woman to propose to man, so? If she proposes, what the worst that could happen? Is this really some low key life-threatening situation that we can ONLY abide by? Is there a written law somewhere that says a woman can’t propose to you? ‘Is you Jesus?’ When she goes down on one knee - beside the ocean - gingerly holding a ring out towards you. Her melanin possessed skin gleaming in the lights dancing with the winds above your heads. You look in her eyes to confirm that this not Pulse TV Pranks, and you’ve never seen such gentle pearls, shedding invincible tears choked with love and happiness. What do you do? How do you respond?

Well, that can only go one of two ways. Your response is going to be negative, or it’ll be positive. Ideally, if you feel you’re ready for holy matrimony, and it’s a good time for you, then by all means please say ‘Yes’. Kiss her, hug her and don’t say anything about her proposing (if peace of mind is heavy on your mind, this is expo). Proceed to make arrangements accordingly. That’s all.

If your answer is the opposite, there’s really isn’t much hope for you unless your girl is one of those extremely rare ones. The best thing I’d recommend is that you immediately establish bodily contact first. Hug her or something. If you can take her someplace private immediately, do that. If not, start to give her your reasons (they better be freaking good). Don’t tell her, explain in short, precise terms why you have just said no when she asked you to marry her. Hopefully, she may see reason and accept the reality of things.

Verdict: Your woman is allowed to propose to you. You don’t have to like it, or be prepared for it. However, this is highly unlikely to happen so you’re relatively safe. For now.

If you do find yourself in this situation, I think you have every right to either say yes or no. Make your decision and consider the potential consequences, before making a decision. End of.

If you have suggestions on what topic I should talk about next on #TheMaleManual or thoughts and opinions on this article, tweet at me @Fxlvrin.

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