#PulseFirstLove is a weekly series that captures the emotions people felt, and the motions they went through the first time they tried being in a relationship.
Today’s subject is a 30-year-old baby boy who tells the story of how he was a shy kid with eyes for only his teenage sweetheart, until he got into uni where things quickly went from zero to hundred with the babes he me there.
So when was the first time you had a crush on someone?
Omo the first time my heart literally skipped a beat at the sight of someone was just after my SS3. Baby girl yen fine daku. I no even know where she dey again
You no toast am?
I toast am. We actually dated for a bit but we split up when my eye tear after I resume Pre Degree in Ife. Awon fine babies fe wound mi. I had to free my baby.
Lmaooooo. Interesting. How old were you at this point?
I was 15 going on 16
And talk to me about toasting a babe for the first time
I was a really shy kid and my mouth often went dry when it came to having that conversation with women back then. Most of the time, I avoid the whole asking out phase and just work with vibes. But my crush was the first girl I asked to be my girlfriend. Apparently she liked me too so it was a bit easy. Invited her from her school to my valedictory service and we really hit it off from there.
Mad. A whole veteran. So she was your first love, would you say?
Yeah Rachel was my first love. But I’ve been a love hoe since then.
How old was she at this point?
She was 15 going on 16 too. We were young lovers.
Hahaha. This is interesting. Can you remember what the relationship was like? How were you as a lover? How was she as a girlfriend? You know, how was that like - dating so young?
Omo it was sweet. Tons of MTN Xtracool conversations. After secondary school before I resumed at Pre-Degree, I rarely used to sleep. We hung out every now and then and she dey come my house.
Surely y'all had limitations?
Of course, there was no total freedom and money no dey.
Were your parents aware?
My momsy knew her. We used to go out and my mom had no problems with that. It was Ib so it was quite sane. It was sweet mehnnn
Gist me a favourite memory from that period
The day we first had sex. We were 2 inexperienced kids just experimenting at my house. Still wondering how I got to be home alone on that day. Can remember the look on her face and her beautiful smile. I should look for her sef, I don vex.
Shior. So that was your favourite memory?
Our conversations too. Most of our xtracool conversations were with me playing Westlife songs in the background. Those moments were priceless bruh. I sometimes wish I could be that guy again
What happened to that guy?
Omo the guy just got into school and started getting too much female attention mehn. I just lost my sweetness over time.
How was that, getting at that female attention at such a young age?
It actually boosted my ego, not gonna lie. I used to be very shy before all of that became a thing. I never still sabi manage the attention actually.
Ok. Let's back it up a little. Tell me about your breakup with Rachel
Distance broke us up actually. I got into PD at Ipetu back then while she was still waiting to get admission. Over time, we couldn’t maintain the distance flow anymore. And I started seeing other babes
How long were you guys together for?
We dated between July and November 2006
There was no conversation about this?
Naaaaaa. We actually didn’t talk about it till maybe 2 years after
Yup yup. We were kids bruh
And how did the conversation go? Did she hold a grudge?
Naaaa. It was light hearted, trust me. We laughed about how immature we were. She was seeing someone and I was hoeing around so we were good.
I see. How has your love life been since her?
Contrary to what many people think. I haven’t had up to 10 relationships. Lol. I had a couple of situationships though. Felt the love rush again with one of my exes but to be honest, I’ve been really lukewarm with relationships ever since.
How old are you now?
30 next month.
Happy birthday in advance.
Lets talk about sex. First time was with her, yeah?
Naaaa, did that in SS2. It was casual though, nothing serious. Lmao
Any prior knowledge? Anyone spoke to you about sex before then?
Porn actually. That was my sole knowledge prior to that moment. Mind you, I was 14 going on 15 at this point and I used to buy discs and all. I’d wake in the middle of the night to watch them.
LMAO. Your royal badness. Did you parents eventually get to educating you on sex?
Naaaah. They just always assume that we’ll know somehow. It's bad. Nigerian parents??? Naaaah. Our generation should change that. If not naija is doomed.
I feel you. Tell me something that relationship taught you
Well I just feel it takes strong commitment from both parties to make a relationship work. One person’s effort shouldn’t outweigh the other’s in my opinion.
So if you could go back in time, would you date her again?
I think I’m a different person now and I bet she is too. It’ll depend on if we can vibe with who we are now. So really I’m not so sure.
I feel you. What would this version of you do differently in that first relationship though?
Communicate sensibly more and of course, invest more in it.
This idea that people don't forget their first love. What do you think about it?
Bro, with loads of experience piling up on your mind, you’ll eventually forget all of the rush trust me.
Mad. Give a 16-year-old some relationship advice
I’ll just like to let them know there’s no pressure and you really don’t need to rush the love process. Let it happen naturally and before it does, enjoy your fuckin hoe phase. Responsibly sha, haq haq haq.
Are you still friends with Rachel? When was the last you heard of her?
I don’t even know where she is or what she’s up to these days. No number, no social media.