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Love and Dating 10 reasons why being single is not a bad thing

Before you fling yourself on the floor and start weeping about your singlehood, pause briefly and read this. Regardless of what you might think, being single is not a bad thing at all.

  • Published:
A single lady play

A single lady


Valentine's Day 2015 is just a few weeks away and while some lovers are already warming up for some romantic dates and treats, a couple of people are not really looking forward to that day.

Why? Because they are single! *Shudders*

Before you fling yourself on the floor and start weeping about your singlehood, pause briefly and read this. Regardless of what you might think, being single is not a bad thing at all. *Dodges shoe*

Don't think so? Check out the following reasons and see why you should celebrate being single:

  1. No compromising: As a single person, you can do whatever it is that you love, without having to compromise for someone else's needs or desires. Maybe you like fried chicken or you like to eat cookies at night in front of the TV. You can indulge in your guilty pleasures or just simply be yourself without having to give up any part of your pleasure in order to codify someone else.

  2. No explaining or justifying: Aside from not having to give up your pleasures, you also do not have to explain or justify to anyone why you like doing them. This is absolutely liberating. Be yourself, no ifs or buts about it.

  3. No guilt: Guilt is one thing that we can definitely do without. But, so much of our relationships revolve around guilt. The compromising and explaining mentioned above are often things we do to protect our relationship from it's demise. We fear the loss. Instead of embracing impermanence and remembering what joys singlehood can bring, we often feel bad and guilty about our "selfish" ways. This leads to self-compromising behaviours.

  4. No jealousy or insecurity: Jealousy is one of the things that comes with a relationship package. It can come from you or your partner. When you celebrate your singlehood, jealousy and insecurity about other people fall down by the wayside. The most important person has become you. The ability to live and let live suddenly becomes within your reach. Bye bye jealousy!

  5. Friends: Not only do partners want explanations and compromise, but they also may be jealous of your friends. Maybe, partners may limit the time you have to spend with friends. In many ways friends are more important than our partners. They are there for us when our relationships hit the rocks. Being single is a great time to nurture your friendships. So, feel free to hang out with your friends and feel not guilt about it.

  6. Develop your identity: Most time, people lose themselves in other people, in their partner or in their relationship, till their personality and identity is all gone. Who are you? What is special about you? Singlehood is when you can really let yourself shine and be who you are meant to be.

  7. Have "me time": One of the best parts of singlehood is the freedom to do what you want, when you want, how you want, why you want and with whom. There is no one to answer to, explain, justify and compromise for. This independence should be embraced. You want a quiet evening at home or an entire week of solitude. It is all yours. Period!

  8. Pursue your dreams: Singlehood affords you the ability to pursue your dreams. Want to travel the world and visit fun places? Guess what? Being single makes these types of dreams much easier. Single people can do the things that those in relationships cannot. Chart uncharted territory, be a trail blazer or do something that you have never done before. It might be easier to do these things without seeking anyone's permission.

  9. Financial independence: Your money is all yours. You don't have to pay for anyone else. You make your own money. So, spend your money the way you want. No joint bank accounts, no one telling you how to spend your money and no one asking you where your money went.

  10. Emotional independence: This is probably the most liberating piece of all. Partners are not always supportive of our emotions. They take your emotions personally, they don't understand them or they don't support what you are feeling. Singles don't have to explain why they feel happy, sad, angry, tired, moody, crabby or frustrated to anyone. Feel free to feel every emotion you have inside of you and not have to respond to anyone else about them.

Yes, some of these things sound downright selfis, but ironically, these seemingly selfish concepts might actually benefit our relationships. We might end up feeling better about ourselves in the long run, which in the end is key for long term happiness.

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