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Relationship Dilemma How to know you're engaged to the wrong person

The questions to ask if you feel you got engaged too early or did it with the wrong person.

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So how do you know that you are engaged to the wrong person? play

So how do you know that you are engaged to the wrong person?

(Iyanda's Diary)

How do you know you are engaged to the wrong person?

If the very idea of being engaged to the wrong person sounds strange to you, then you probably have not seen or heard the recent revelation by Glo chief, Mike Adenuga’s son, Paddy, who revealed on Tuesday, January 9, 2017, that he has  been engaged twice but has had to quit both engagements.

The reasons for those decisions remain yet unknown.

Rapper, Eva Alordiah also ended her 16-month-old engagement to boyfriend, Ceasar, in 2017.

Paddy Adenuga says he has been engaged twice but called them off. play Paddy Adenuga has revealed that he had been engaged twice; and broke up with his partner on both occasions. (Twitter / Paddy Adenuga)

So obviously, being engaged does not always translate to going all the way.

Sometimes people cut things short when they realise they might have moved too fast or ignored the signs and that going on would be a worse mistake than getting engaged in the first instance.

So how do you know that you are engaged to the wrong person?

1. Are you the best version of yourself with them?

“Marrying the right person will provide you with the partner and… support that lets you become who you are meant to be.

“Marrying the wrong person will prevent (or at least delay) you from achieving the [best possible version of]. You”- Andrew G. Vaughn, American divorce attorney / Professor of Domestic Relations Law at Loyola University, Chicago School of Law.

ALSO READ: 5 things that prove that being single isn't always terrible

2. Was your engagement a result of societal pressure?

Disappointed young woman. play Did you have to say yes to the engagement due to societal pressure? (DABW)

Most times, people just go with the flow. University, service, work for few years… and [yeah, you guessed right] marriage!

Michelle Crosby, CEO of Wevorce says: “when we ask couples why they got married, what we most often hear is, "It was what I thought we should do.”

Wevorce is an American legal mediation company that specializes in amicable divorce.

So, apparently, at some certain stage people often tend to bend to subtle and obvious pressure from folks and friends to settle down, and this could lead to making the mistake of proposing to someone that you should not even have been with.

3. Do your ideas of 'forever' align?

How do I tell my wife that my girlfriend is having a baby for me? play Do you view relationships and marriages from the same angle? (StLuciaNewsOnline)

“At some point, you’d need to define what ‘forever’ means to you, and what it means to your partner,” Crosby says.

While it is ideal to have these conversations and make these discoveries before getting engaged at all, finding out after engagement is still great.

At least, that way you can discover the irreconcilable differences and move away.

It’ll be an engagement broken and not a marriage crashed.

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