Here’s the biggest sexual problem Nigerian couples have – according to sex expert

Being in love with someone and maintaining an acceptable level of intimacy requires work. This explains why at some point, many couples encounter difficulties in maintaining a bright spark in the intimacy they share.

Sex becomes a chore, physical connection becomes strained and stressful and of course, it will only be a matter of time before the bitterness seeps into other aspects of the relationship. Before you know it, communication suffers greatly, resentment builds up and more problems are created just because of unresolved issues in the bedroom.

For Nigerian couples, the most prevalent cause of this lack of intimacy is dead libido, says Aminat Ayeni, a sex therapist and CEO of Aminat’s Secret.

According to Aminat who has a thriving aphrodisiac store and relationship and sex therapy company in Lagos, the biggest sexual problem that Nigerian couples have is a zero interest in sex, particularly on the part of the women.

She tells Pulse that “the number one issue that I come across on a daily basis is women not enjoying sex.”

She says women have “zero libido and it’s causing issues in relationships and marriages.” The interest in sex is so reduced that the very act of being physically intimate with their partners in any way becomes “like a chore for them.”

When partners find themselves arriving here in their romantic relationship, it could possibly be a problem caused by the inability of men to pleasure their partners enough.

ALSO READ:Why it's important to date someone whose sex drive matches yours

By having an inadequate knowledge of how to set the mood right for a woman, what to do and where to touch on her body, men could have doused their partners’ desire in getting down. Because what’s the point of having sex when it is hardly ever pleasurable for her?

It is always said that bad sex is just as bad as denying your partner sex totally. Obviously, by consistently not getting pleasured, it is only logical that the sexual desire and interest of these women would suffer.

Even her aphrodisiacs and pleasure enhancing products which get rave reviews from clients will be useless if a partner is clueless on the basic sexual things to do with a woman’s body behind closed doors, Aminat adds.

The solution to this, according to Aminat, is communication.

“As Nigerians we are quite timid in the bedroom area. [People] look at it like it’s a taboo to talk about sex and they do not talk to their spouse, they don’t talk to their husbands, and boyfriends on how they should explore their body to enjoy sex. So that’s a major issue. If you are not communicating with your man, how are you supposed to enjoy sex?”

And it’s true. As this Pulse articlehere clearly explains, refusing to talk about sex is disadvantageous to your sexual well-being, especially with your partner, on whose shoulders you have placed the task of pleasuring you.