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Do good girls also finish last? [Part 3] – Hope is not lost for good girls

So, it might be established that good girls may finish last. But ladies, if you indeed fall into this category of good girls, how do you ensure that you finish well and are not left behind?

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Hope is not lost. play

Hope is not lost.


Confidence is one of the most important traits in a woman.

A whole load of confidence.

There is something very sexy about a woman who is proud of whom she truly is. When a woman keeps her head held high, men will notice, and have genuine respect for her. The truth is men can smell a lack of confidence from miles away; and even if a woman is the most beautiful on the planet, a tiny whiff of insecurity could reduce her bride price.

Never, ever, EVER settle.

As rare a breed as a good man may seem these days, there are still a few out there. Men are competitive creatures who rarely settle for less than they desire. So why should women settle? It is, however, heartbreaking to find that these days, many women do indeed settle for lower standards than they deserve because of societal pressure to get married before a certain age or to get married…period; or even the anxiety brought about by a ticking biological clock for those who desire to have children.

Read Also: Do good girls also finish last? [Part 1]

Confidence is a must always play

Confidence is a must always



Be yourself (and do not apologise for it).

There is nothing that bothers me more than people who pretend to be who they are not: those who keep up with the Joneses or just make decisions based on what is supposedly cool or not. It is a major sign of insecurity. There is no need for a woman to lie about any aspect of herself just because she wants to conform to what society or a man deems acceptable.

This is easier said than done but if things don’t work out with a person for that reason, wouldn’t it be somewhat gratifying knowing that you were true to yourself? Besides, no one wants to date a liar and then find out he/she is a completely different person e.g. a psychopath, abusive partner or serial killer after they eventually get married.

Be sexy, but classy and elegant

Let’s face it, men are visual creatures. They are driven by testosterone, so some level of attraction is required. Without changing too much, there are a few things a good girl could do to ensure that a man notices her:

Good girls are sometimes underrated. play

Good girls are sometimes underrated.



  • Wear clothes that suit your body type: Women have all been blessed with different bodies, and thank God for fashion geniuses who have figured that out. So wear what suits you and don’t be afraid to take some fashion risks. However, you also want to leave something to the man’s imagination and not give it all away.
  • Wear a pair of high heels: When you go out, high heels always add some elegance to your look. But don’t go for a pair of shoes that you are not comfortable walking elegantly in, because you would pretty much just end up looking silly.
  • Wear some makeup: We don’t have to go all out like those before and after pictures of those who go to make up artists to perform some magic and deceive potential toasters at weddings in Lagos these days. Just be subtle and wear the right colour scheme that would simply enhance your features, even when you go to work.
  • Pay attention to general appearance and hygiene: Even when you’re doing a low-key/non-official activity like going to the supermarket or the gym, make a conscious effort with your appearance and hygiene. Take a shower before leaving your house, wear clean clothes (remember to iron them) and take a few seconds to look at the mirror and adjust your hair.
  • Loosen up without compromising your values: Be a little more adventurous, do not take yourself too seriously all the time…flirt a little, dance a little, live a little…. But just do what you truly enjoy.
Good girls are sometimes underrated. play

Good girls are sometimes underrated.



Read Also: Do good girls also finish last? [Part 2] – How bad girls win

Good girls are sometimes underrated. But it is important to remember that they can get by just by being their sweet selves. It might take a while, and there will be disappointments along the way, but it could end up being worth it at the end of the day. Remember, good things come to those who wait…. patience is a virtue… the patient dog eats the largest bone…. etc, etc, etc.

Oyin Egbeyemi is an engineer-turned-consultant-turned-educationist, runner and writer.

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