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Married Life 7 divorced men and women explain why their marriages failed

These stories show that love could drive you into a marriage, but it is never enough to keep that marriage alive.

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Divorced spouses explain why their marriages failed play

Divorced spouses explain why their marriages failed

(Black and Married With Kids)

When asked for reasons why their marriages failed, divorced persons would always talk about how 'things just didn't work out like they thought it would.'

People do not divorce unless some negative changes occurred along the line, and those changes became so overwhelming that a divorce became the only sensible thing to do.

Below, seven people [names changed for anonymity purposes] explain the exact reasons why their marriages failed.

1. He did not prioritize our marriage

Motun says her ex did not put her or the marriage first, something which proved to be the end of their marriage. “Commitment was missing. Our relationship was never the most important thing in his life. Work and his friends always seemed more important,” she says.

play He did not prioritize our marriage (Black Love Advice)

 

2. Distrust ruined our intimacy

"We lost that incredibly special foundation of trust and intimacy with each other," says Ahmed.

"We became more like roommates than intimate partners.”

ALSO READ: 5 times when letting go of a relationship is OK

3. We didn’t discuss big life decisions with each other

Christian's marriage was potentially damaged before it even began because he and his ex-wife failed to discuss important life decisions before saying their wedding vows.

“We really didn’t know how to communicate well. At first, it was easy because we didn’t have complicated issues to discuss, but as more challenging times arose, I made independent decisions rather than having open conversations with her and involving her in the decision-making process.

play We were young and happy, but the young age later became our undoing (Botswana Youth Magazine)

This reduced our intimacy, worsened her fear of conflict and my co-dependent nature. I now that love is not enough, without good communication" he says.

4. We married far too young

For Mona, marrying too early played a huge part in the ruin of her marriage. “To a degree, I think marrying too young ruined us. The lack of maturity resulted in a tumultuous marriage.

ALSO READ: 3 ways people ruin perfect relationships

My ex-husband and I lacked the tolerance, patience and understanding that is critical for all healthy adult relationships and we found ourselves separated before 30."

5. We took each other for granted

“Our relationship while married had somehow developed into a non-meaningful one.

We grew into two different people, and the connection and partnership we’d formed all those years ago became damaged and we were so unhappy despite how hard we tried," says Ifeanyi.

Divorced spouses explain why their marriages failed play Divorced spouses explain why their marriages fail (Black and Married With Kids)

6. Not much effort

Femi says“When I reflect on what was missing from my marriage, honestly, I always reach the conclusion that I did not do enough. I could have done better, really."

7. No friendship

“We weren’t friends. Everyone and everything else was always more important.”

According to Dayo, it was as bad as that between her and her ex-husband.

She says somehow they both knew it was only a matter of time before they went their separate ways, so when it happened, it really did not surprise any of them.

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