This is how easy it is to get hooked on painkillers

When you think of a drug addict, you probably imagine a guy who looks like an extra from The Wire or Breaking Bad—semi-homeless, shabby, and shuffling around on “the wrong side of the tracks.”

The reality is different. Many guys who get hooked on prescription painkillers are successful professionals. More often than not, their downward spiral into addiction starts with a legitimate prescription from a well-meaning doctor or dentist.

That’s exactly how it happened for five men. Here are their stories, in their own words.

COMPUTER TECHNICIAN AND WEBSITE DEVELOPER

How It StartedI had a wisdom tooth out at age 24, and the doctor prescribed me 12 Vicodin. Immediately I enjoyed the buzz it gave me. I finished the pills and a couple weeks went by, and I thought nothing of it.

One night I was with people, and someone crushed up some Vicodin pills to snort them. I wasn’t interested, but they worked on me for a while and finally I put the straw to my nose.

How It Became an AddictionWithin a couple of days, I was doing that every half hour to hour. It happened that fast. I got some Percocet, which is more energetic, and it became my drug of choice—always crushed and blown. I don’t think I actually swallowed a pain pill for 7 years.

When I Realized I Was In TroubleI was shacked up with a few friends and jobless. I was broke, and I started stealing money from my family. The drugs literally shut down the part of your brain that makes decisions.

My cousin, whom I was close to—I stole her laptop to sell. She said, “Go to rehab or I’m going to the police with the evidence.”

I went to a hospital and detoxed for 3 days, and then I got out and relapsed right away. Up until a year ago, I was hiding it. Once someone sees you high every day, it becomes part of your personality and they don’t see it as being different. And it becomes the only way you can function. I was at 150 mg a day—anywhere from 20 to 30 pills a day and they’re like $8 a piece.

How I Recovered From My AddictionI started on buprenorphine [a medication that is prescribed to recovering addicts, which provides a weaker high] to taper off. I felt like crap but it was nothing like full-blown withdrawal.

We addicts can live a normal life, we just need help. Now the only issue is the want. I’m not sick anymore. I’m a month clean and I’m going to start going to outpatient group meetings three times a week.

AUTO REPAIR SHOP OWNER AND PODCAST PRODUCER

How It StartedI was in the Army the first time I was prescribed. I had my wisdom teeth out, and they gave me 100 Vicodin to take “as needed.” I ran out and said I still had pain. I ended up with 200 or 300 pills total. My friends knew it would be a better high if we crushed and snorted them, so we did—all in a day or two.

How It Became an AddictionFor the most part, after you’re addicted, you don’t even really get high anymore. I would have to do $120 worth of pills a day just to not be sick. People think, oh, these addicts just want to get high. But most of us can’t even afford to get high. I’d have to do two 30 mg pills as soon as I’d get up to take the sickness away.

When I Realized I Was In TroubleIn 2014, my wife was pregnant with our second child. She was using as well and had to quit. But she wasn’t using as much as I was, and so she was able to just stop.

I was working a lot and it got worse for me. I got her hooked again as soon as she gave birth. We never really hit a “rock bottom” like people talk about, like getting fired or stealing from people. It was more of an emotional issue and a marital issue due to wild emotions caused by the ramping up and down from usage.

How I Recovered From My AddictionAbout 9 months after our son was born, in September 2015, we both went to detox.

It’s really hard to get the treatment to get clean. I know people whose insurance pays for 130 pills a month but won’t cover detox or rehab. Literally it’s like, “Here’s your poison, but no we won’t get you clean.”

My wife goes to a counselor still. I don’t, but I should. I’m in Washington where weed is legal, and I smoke weed and drink more now than I did. I’m an addict—I self-medicate. It will likely not change, it’ll just shift from thing to thing.

RECORDING ARTIST AND SINGER-SONGWRITER

How It StartedIn 2008, I had an ulcer on my throat and it had abscessed into my face and my ear. I was in terrible pain, and as a singer I needed to use my throat. I was prescribed hydrocodone.

I loved the feeling it gave me. It made me feel normal! The drug tells your brain you’re feeling good, so you think, this is how I should feel all the time.

I got my prescriptions through a pain management clinic. They have a lot of regulations. But at the same time, they can’t feel your pain so they’re going off your word, and addicts use that to their advantage.

How It Became an AddictionEventually your body becomes dependent on the chemicals that the drug is producing in your brain. Without those chemicals, you start getting sick. It’s like the flu but maybe 10 times worse—not exaggerating.

A lot of people who get hooked stay on them because when you go off, you think the pain is coming back, but you’re actually going into withdrawal. You get real depressed and you start aching all over. It’s a very scary, depressing, strange, sick feeling.

When I Realized I Was In TroubleEventually, I was taking about 12 pills a day, 10 mg each. I ended up losing my job. I had been singing with a gospel group, and had been their lead singer for 10 years. They’d given me several chances to get right, and ultimately, I never got the help I needed. They allowed me to resign and step down, which was very gracious of them.

How I Recovered From My AddictionI went to an inpatient treatment program and it saved my life. The counselors were just amazing. They said that only 10 percent of the people who attend the program would stay sober. I really want to be that 10 percent, so I really have to listen to everything they have to say. They looked at me like I was sick and I needed help—not like I was a bad guy.

CONTRACTOR AND CARPENTER

How It StartedI was prescribed oxycodone after hurting my back making a delivery in 2011. My doctor told me that even if I wasn’t in pain, I needed to take the pills every 8 hours because the pain would be worse if the medication wasn’t already “on board” before a flair-up.

Each month I would walk into his office and he would continue to prescribe me painkillers and recommend I stay away from work and on disability. Then he opened a pain clinic, and I only saw him every 3 months. He would give me a supply of painkillers and send me on my way. This went on for about 7 years.

How It Became an AddictionOnce my workers comp insurance ran out, the doctor told me I would have to start coming monthly and pay $380 per visit, which I couldn’t afford. So I started to buy my pills from people I knew. I did that for about 4 years and started taking more and more pills.

I knew early on that I was addicted, but I didn’t think there was anything I could do. I asked my doctor if there was a medication I could take to get off of the painkillers, and he told me no.

When I Realized I Was In TroubleOne day in February 2016, I finished up work and was driving home and realized that I was just done using. I called my sister and had her contact the rest of my family to let them know about my situation. No one knew I was addicted to painkillers because I didn’t lose anything or mess up my life.

How I Recovered From My AddictionI had heard about the benefits of medically assisted treatment using buprenorphine, and I started calling around. I found a clinic that offered it, and I took it once a day to help me fight off cravings and get my life back. Up to that point, I had not been off of painkillers for more than 12 hours at one time for years. Since February, I’ve been on a plan that combines medically assisted treatment with individual counseling.

SUBSTANCE ABUSE COUNSELOR

How It StartedI had all my wisdom teeth removed when I was 19, and I was prescribed Percocet. It was enough for about 10 days. I liked the feeling the pills gave me.

My cousin was like, “Percocet, that gets you f***** up—you can snort them.”

I remember thinking, wow, this is awesome! I called my doctor and said, hey, my mouth still really hurts. They refilled my prescription. After that was gone, I remember thinking, “I might have a problem with these drugs.”

Within two years, I broke my ankle—a really bad compound fracture—and they put me on a morphine drip and a hydrocodone prescription. That’s when it really got going.

How It Became an AddictionI met a guy who worked at a pharmaceutical supply company and he could get liquid oxy at a cheap price. I could take it every day, and more and more and more.

When I finally stopped, I couldn’t sleep and I was having cold sweats. I thought I was just strung out on the stuff. I didn’t realize it was withdrawal. After 3 or 4 days, I’d feel fine again, and start doing it again. I would go on and come off because I would start to feel guilty. And it just kept going in that direction.

When I Realized I Was In TroubleEventually, the guy with the liquid oxy got busted. In my mind, the addict-thinking was, “You’ve been doing synthetic heroin this whole time; what’s the difference between that and doing real heroin?”

So I went from pain pills to heroin. I was snorting heroin and the people I was with were getting so much higher when they injected it, so I decided to try it. Someone injected me while I looked away. If you told me when I was 18 that some day I would be addicted to shooting heroin, I could not imagine a way that would’ve unfolded.

Today I can see how easy that is. I’ve never met anyone who was like, “I just started shooting heroin.” They all start with Percocet, oxy—it’s the same progression every time.

How I Recovered From My AddictionI tried a bunch of times to stop. I would delete the numbers of my dealers, detox, and feel like shit. Then I would feel better and think, “One more time won’t hurt.”

I finally got into a state-funded treatment center and I was ready to do whatever they said. I did the 12 steps and moved into a sober-living house. I’ve been clean ever since March 12, 2012. I got a job at the treatment center and worked my way up to being a counselor.