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SexVille Tuesday: How To Make Your Man The King In Bed Tonight

It is another Tuesday again and another mind-blowing, sex-sational and orgasmic Sex Ville comes your way. This week, we are taking a look at what our women can do to give us the kind of sex we have always fantasized about. In case you forget, sex is not just about the woman taking in all the pleasures – as it is said, sex actually happens in a woman while the man is a mere projection, giving her all the pleasure, but you ladies could also take charge and pleasure us in some out of this world ways. So sit back, relax, soak it all in – but make sure it is only with your better half.

Have you ever thought of making your spouse so happy in bed that he will never ever think of another woman? You know that feeling that makes him always want to run back to you? Then take this in, make him happy and change the power struggle

Men want to be desired too: Women are customized to be the objects of desire not the owners of desire. They grow up thinking that sex is something that happens to them, not something they can make happen. Seldom, they feel as agents of their sexual lives. Some of them are filled with insecurity in their physical appearance and this hampers their abilities to give pleasure. They may also struggle to reveal their erotic imagination lest they raise suspicion or resentment in their partners. Yes, we know some of our men may look at such ladies as loose but, hey, a majority of us prefer women who are ‘whores’ in bed, even if we may not say so or admit it to ourselves. Upbringing may also inhibit a woman’s expression in the bedroom as well as adult anxiety could weaken them reaching out in this powerful way to reassure their partners of their commitment to them. But wait a minute; a commitment to grow strong in the erotic core fulfills the pledge of fidelity, away from others, and more importantly, onto an exciting sexual relationship. Your man does not just want sex; he wants you to want him. It’s ever so slightly different but there’s almost a spiritual difference. Wanting confirms your love and reveals your vulnerability to your primitive bond with each other. For many men, sex IS love, sex IS connection and a woman’s sexual initiation, compliments, and “winks across the party” offer deep feelings of both excitement and security. If you want your man to stick to you, sexual desire is what sets you apart as unique. Expressing your desire says – I want you - we belong together.

Stop, drop and roll every once in a while: Women need lots of time to get into the mood and even more time to reach orgasm. Once in a while, you need to get yourself in the mood and ready, blow his mind (and anything else that comes to mind.) You should unleashed your sexual aggression; be hungry; devour him. Forget all those ‘Mary Amaka’ wraps you cover yourself in and dress up in and dress up in DESIRE. Some of our women say they, “I can’t do it if I don’t feel connected.” But it can’t always be one directional. If your partner bonds sexually, need sex to feel relaxed and talkative, initiate toward your mutual goal of being connected. Every healthy marriage goes through three stages: fall in, fall out and fall back in love. Falling out of love strips away our oft distorted projections of who our partner is – offering us the first clear sight of a real “other,” usually not the prince or the toad but a real human being with warts. The commitment necessary to fall back in love is simple; SEX. Love your partner the way they like to be loved. This opens the space for true reciprocity. The risk is, he will take all your love and use it up without giving back. With ordinary good people, a one spouse-only, six month commitment of loving your partner their way will radically change the marriage. You must convince, support, cajole, wheedle, and move to take the risk first; over and over. More often than not, you will see how quickly your partner responds to the untallied, uncalculated gift of unconditional love. Save yourself the trouble of your man ‘playing away’. A woman who values her man, need to really take this chance. You will become a more whole woman in the process. It’s difficult to risk when you already feel empty, yet usually, your partner has a mirror experience of your feelings. He feels empty too. Change your marriage, change the family climate, change the divorce rate, change your children’s lives, change the ‘other woman’ mentality, and change your world.

Grab him: Yeah, grab him ‘there.’ If you are going to initiate, go for broke. The most common complaint from men whose wives claim they did initiate is, “I didn’t get the signal.” If you do not take the initiative often, by the time you get around to it, he will be surprised and may not be able to get ‘Little Johnny’ up and by then, you will be shocked. So why not start now while he still finds you desirable? Be strip dancer and watch his imagination go wild. Do things those girls out there do to him and see if he will still have the energy to play the ‘away game’. He needs some connection first; some men don’t want to drop their briefcase and roll in the foyer. For him, feel free to offer tease him in a sexual way and give him the back rub. You probably don’t like him to initiate by grabbing your breast or vulva; but men often try this because it’s how they fantasize being approached, so to reiterate, try it his way.

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Offer up a sexy debrief the next morning: Men love to hear what you think of the last experience. Talking about sex is almost like having sex. Most women think if they start talking about it, he’ll start thinking about it and be disappointed that she doesn’t want to start all over again. Probably true. But if you’re really opposed to doing it again in the morning, wait and text him the debrief. Let him know how good he made you feel and I tell you, he’ll swagger into his morning meeting with the boss. You will have his full attention at the breakfast table and he will find an excuse to break free from the boys in the evening and hurry home and you can also suggest ways that will make it better for you. He won’t be lost in his own overpowering lust. Do a high-low-high analysis. Say things like “I loved it when you touch me in such places; next time, it would really be better for me if you did this way. You gave me the best orgasm I have ever had.” Boy, you will be amazed at what he will do to you that night because you have set a standard for him and every man likes to outdo himself. You can also tell him what he did not do right and he will surely look for a way of making up to you. Men are always seeking for ways of ‘beating’ you to it and he will not want to disappoint.

Ladies, try these tricks tonight and do not forget to send the thanks coming.

Am Out.

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