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Pulse Nigeria Poll Readers think it is best to stay and help a spouse with sexual problems

57% of Pulse Nigeria Poll readers have advised Christiana to stay put in her marriage and help her husband to overcome his sexual inadequacies.

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What would you say to this sad woman? (Illustration) play

What would you say to this sad woman? (Illustration)

(Getty Images)

Christiana is unlucky to be married to a man who is sexually incapable of giving her satisfaction.

In her words, her husband of two years, Joshua, is a one-minute-man who cannot perform in bed and hence, she is thinking of leaving him so as to get a man who would be able to make her feel like a woman.

Read her story here:

"My name is Christiana, a 30-year-old woman. I have been married for two years now but I am not sure I can cope with the marriage again.

The reason for my decision is the fact that my husband, Joshua, is what can be called a one-minute man when it comes to sex.

I have tried to cope and live with the situation but in truth, I can no longer take it again. I won't shy away from the fact that as a woman, sex means a lot to me and a man who cannot satisfy me in bed has always been a no go area for me.

When I was a single lady, I indulged and enjoyed sex very much, and in the same vein, I expect my husband to be able to satisfy me so I would be tempted to get another man to do that for him.

I know many will say I should have known what I was getting into before agreeing to get married to him. That is true but the fact is that during our courtship, it was not possible for us to get intimate because Joshua is an associate pastor in our church and premarital sex is strongly frowned upon.

We actually met in church and typical of such relationships, everything was shaped by the doctrines of the church and even our meeting were restricted.

We dated or as it is called in the church, our courtship lasted just six months and we got married. The first signs of trouble was on our wedding night. I was anxiously waiting for my newly wedded husband to join me in the bedroom after all the guests had left but he did not show up.

I must have slept off because when I woke up and looked at the time, it was 2am and Joshua was not with me.

I got out of bed and as I approached the sitting room, I heard him praying seriously and speaking in tongues.

I was shocked that a man who just got married left his wife all alone and was praying. I waited for him to finish and come to bed but my husband prayed till it was morning.

The first time time we made love was almost a week after our wedding and that was when I knew I was in trouble. After a long foreplay, Joshua managed to get erect but before he could enter me, he had ejaculated.

I thought it was the excitement of making love to his wife for the first time but tried as much as I did, he could not get erect again.

Since then, it has been the same story and my advise that he seeks medical help has fallen on deaf ears as he believes prayers would solve the problem.

I am getting frustrated and getting fed up by the day and I do not want to commit adultery.

What should I do?


The teaser for the day was:

Would you dump your spouse on account of bad sex?

How Nigeria voted:

Yes, I will so that I will not commit adultery - 17%

 No, I will stay with him/her and seek medical help - 57%

I will stay but get my satisfaction with another person  - 8%

I will stay because sex is not everything in a marriage - 17%

How would you vote here?

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