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Pulse Nigeria Poll Readers believe that good sex is needed for a relationship to be stable

45% of Pulse Nigeria Poll voters are of the view that good sex is one of the ingredients for a good and stable relationship.

  • Published:
This worried woman needs advice (Illustration) play

This worried woman needs advice (Illustration)


Pamela, a 28-year-old lady who believes she is not one to shy away from sex and thinks it is one of the key factors that keeps a relationship stable and stops spouses from cheating on one another.

She insists she and her fiance, Danny, should start having sex to be sure if they are compatible but Danny does not think so, as he believes that sex is meant for only married people and therefore, they should wait till they get married.

Read Pamela's letter here:

"My name is Pamela, a 28-year-old lady. I live and work in Lagos. I have a problem that has been threatening to truncate my impending marriage because my fiance is averse to sex before marriage and I am one woman who would want to be sure of my man before I take a lifelong decision.

I know many women out there will shout me down, calling me names and saying that sex is not everything but let me say one thing here: I am not that type of a woman who would pretend that sex is not everything.

For me, sex, and I mean good sex, comes in quite high on my list of good qualities in a man because once I get married, I would not want to cheat on my husband and he should be able to satisfy adequately in bed.

When I met Danny, I knew he was the kind of man I would love to settle down with but one thing I noticed quite early was that he was not the kind of man who would not wait to get a woman to bed. He is romantic alright but it ends there and all efforts to seduce fell flat because he was not all that keen.

Whenever we were together and I tried to get him aroused, he would find an excuse to extricate himself. Even when I managed to get his penis hard, he would lose erection before I got to first base. I tried talking to him and asking him if he has any problem so we should seek solutions together but he told me he did not have any problem.

He kept assuring me that he was man enough and that I would even get tired of sex ponce we get married. But that is not what I want as I want to be sure my husband to be is the kind of man who would give me the kind of sex I want and I would not have cause to cheat on him.

I am becoming desolate about the impending wedding because Danny has vowed that we would never have sex until we are married.

What can I do?


The teaser for the day was:

Does sex really matter in a relationship?

How Nigeria voted:

Yes, sex matters a lot in a relationship - 33%

No, sex is not important as long as other qualities are there - 22%

There would not be a stable relationship without good sex - 45%

How would you vote here?

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