Welcome to Lekky’z Lounge, where anything and everything can happen. Today, I am joined by some crazy boys, Tito, Koko and Kane.
Now let me give you a brief bio of these guys: Kane, oh my God, what can I say about this dude? He is the suave, man-about-town gigolo who has everything going for him in terms of babes. In fact, Kane is the bomb and the one we all look up to.
Tito is the nice guy, the one the babes drool for, the man with the honey tongue who can make a nun eat out of his palms.
Koko is reserved, introverted, quiet and shy guy. He is the fellow every girl wants to take home to mama, but don’t be deceived, Koko is not the saint he puts out.
Me, Lekky, I will not pretend and say I am an angel. Far from it; I am the bad guy, the initiator, the ‘director of balling,’ because, I ‘ball’ for a living.
Naturally, people solicit my advice on a fairly regular basis, and most times, it bothers on sex. Questions like; “Is there a secret to getting more sex?”
“I’m not having sex right now: heeeeeelp meeeee, pleeeeaaaasssseeee," they'll growl.
And me, like the Robocop, I will be feeling cool and dishing out from my wealth of experience.
So here we were at the Lounge where some bottles of Black Label and Hennessey had been dispossessed of their liquid content, when Mr. Reserved Koko, popped a question:
“Why don’t babes like nice guys?”
He question was for me and he was waiting for an answer. I tried to focus my gaze at him but I failed because some cobwebs were playing some games in my brain. But after ruminating for a while, I tried to deal with the question like the expert I am.
“Let me paint a scenario here,” I began; “You're at a bar, you see some smashingly looking babes walk in and you turn to one of your friends and say something cool and sexual, like ‘Boy, she's damn pretty and I am sure she will be awesome in bed. I'm gonna go ask her out.”
That’s how you drunken guys talk in bars, right?
“You stroll up, you put on your Nice Guy Smile and toss out your Nice Guy Wave and say a bunch of Nice Guy Things, and, because the universe is unjust, she doesn't feel anything for you, neither does she think you are the kind of guy that can light her fire. What happened? Must be her problem, right? Wrong.
The hard truth is that chicks just don't dig nice guys. Wait, no, I worded that wrong. What I mean is that chicks don't dig just nice guys.”
“I have a wide range of characteristics to describe nice guys and they include being pleasant, kind, smiling, blue shirt and tie, 9-5 jobs, clean, mama’s boy-like and with human hands. I've heard some guys complain about their niceness. You hear things like: ‘Every girl says she's ‘just looking for a nice guy,’ yet I'm a nice guy, no one ever wants me, and girls keep going out with assholes!’
“Boy, do I hear that all the time, usually coming from the nice boys? In fact, in my years as a semi-professional expert in the study of Balls-Out Fucksmanship, no joke here guys, I have never once heard a woman say she was ‘just looking for a nice guy.’ I've heard it from lonely guys, jaded guys, hacky stand-up comedians, and sitcoms, but never from a woman.”
“I don’t know if any of you guys know why women prefer the bad guys,” I asked around, almost certain Kane Bad Guy will have an answer to that.
Kane: “I know some reasons women do not really dig the nice guys.”
Tito: “And what are these reasons?”
Me: “Easy guys, we need to get some more drinks.”
Kane: “Sure, drinks must be available before I unleash the result of me extensive research.”
While we wait for our drinks, make sure you are the Lounge next week to know the reasons bad boys get the nice girls, well, most of the time.