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Pulse Movie Review Tope Alake's "Stormy Hearts" falls flat

Directed with misplaced enthusiasm, "Stormy Hearts" is a hilarious movie that will be forgotten as soon as you exit the cinema hall.

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Stormy Hearts play

Stormy Hearts

Every year, there seems to be a need to do at least one vaguely different Nollywood movie, and this year's appears to be Tope Alake's "Stormy Heart."
 

A music-oriented movie, it's Judith Audu's sophomore production after the successful outing of "Just Not Married," a film which earned Rotimi Salami an Africa Magic Viewers Choice Award.

Just like her first movie, Audu assembles actors who are not exactly familiar faces.

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts" play

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts"

 

"Stormy Hearts" follows Basi, a music producer who breaks up with his protege and girlfriend Kachi, after she abandons him for Johnson, a richer music producer in town (Johnson is probably one of those producers who do not own a studio as we don't get to see him in any throughout the movie).

The breakup hits Basi hard and he decides to spend his time wallowing in self-pity, in the company of his piano [a piano which he is terrible at playing].

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts" play

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts"

In another part of the city is Ella, a prostitute who escapes from her abusive pimp Golddigger. She steals three million naira and escapes to another 'city' to start a new life [except that this city is somewhere on Lagos Island. So much for new beginnings.]

Coincidentally, she finds an apartment right next to Basi’s flat, where she hears Basi playing mournfully [and terribly]on the piano each night.

And as expected, Ella and Basi's path cross, and they develop a relationship that 'changes both their lives forever.'

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts" play

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts"

If the above plot sounds appalling, it's even worse on screen. The story is without a shred of believability. It's so badly carried out that you would probably find it hilarious, but, for the wrong reasons.

Without fear, Ella, who is still in the same town as her dreaded Pimp, makes a public appearance as a contestant on a music talent hunt competition. A competition which she wins after a ludicrous performance.

The talent hunt competition is effortlessly bad, major thanks to the host (Omoye Uzamere) who was a huge distraction. The writer of "Stormy Hearts" obviously didn't visit lounges where such competitions hold or even see any of our numerous reality TV shows.

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts" play

Character posters for "Stormy Hearts"

 

For a music movie, there are no original songs, while the familiar tunes are delivered with so much laxity.

Actually, the worst parts of this movie come when the 'musicians' are singing or playing their instruments. They fail to convince at several levels as they deliver performances that can be uncomfortable to sit through.

There's nothing musical about "Stormy Hearts."

Every time you think the movie has gone extreme with its horrible dialogue and plot developments, it will toss you another one - like Kachi suffering from amnesia after a harmless fall.

The acting is amateurish, especially Eddie Watson as Basi, who delivers a deadpan performance. Christiana Martin, who doesn't also impress, manages to elicit giggles from the audience with her 'do you want juice?' trademark question.

Greg Ojefua and Tomiwa Kukoyi as Kosi and Lekan (Ella's neighbours) try too hard to amuse. They could probably make you laugh, but only if you have a sense of humour that sparks at the sight of the slightest dense action.

Kelechi Udegbe as Golddigger impresses with his gangster look and actions, albeit exaggerated. But, he still doesn't save the movie.

Kenneth Okolie in "Stormy Hearts" play

Kenneth Okolie in "Stormy Hearts"

 

Directed by Tope Alake and written by Brenda Ogbukaa and Chijioke Ononiwu, the movie stars Christiana Martin, Theresa Edem, Eddie Watson, Kenneth Okoli, Fred Amata, Rotimi Salami, Kelechi Udegbe, Gregory Ojefua, Tomiwa Kukoyi, Etinosa Idemudia, Debbie Ohiri among others.

Directed with misplaced enthusiasm, "Stormy Hearts" is a hilarious movie that will be forgotten as soon as you exit the cinema hall.

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