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Pulse Blogger Change is the only constant

After all, as human beings, we tend to like people who are like us or have one or two things in common with us.

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(Working Smarter)

I made what some people may think is unexpected career change recently: the aspiring architect, turned engineer, attempted banker, turned consultant…. who is now trying to be an educationist.

But maybe I’m just being a little dramatic about all these changes because as much as change seems to be the only constant in my life, the truth is that many of us do not like change…we do not like it at all, we am risk averse, panic, worry, get confused and sometimes have the tendency to go a little crazy when we lose control over ourselves and certain situations.

Change and control…. we can’t hold on to them; as much as we may try, its not up to us. Sometimes, letting go and just doing the best we can, in whatever situation we find ourselves, may not be so much of a disservice to ourselves.

However, this brings forward questions that I’ve been asking myself a lot lately, “Why do we do the things we do? What really motivates us?” These questions sound pretty simple, don’t they? Well, if you think about them critically, they are actually not so simple.

So I wonder how we manage to “bobo” our way through job interviews when asked such questions as these? To be honest, there are some people who have a genuine interest or specific skills that suit that particular company and role they are being interviewed for. However, for many people, (most of whom are just hustling to get a job…any job that will pay the bills, provide some work experience or just look good on their CVs), we would have actually just studied what people want to hear.

So before we go for job interviews, we study the company of interest and if we are given the name of the person who is interviewing us, we go ahead and find out as much as we can about them in the context of that interview.

Sometimes, we may even go as far as doing some research on where they went to school, their hobbies, where they worship, the things they like and so on… just in case they happen to be warm enough to make small talk during that interview and we can throw in common interests.

After all, as human beings, we tend to like people who are like us or have one or two things in common with us.

However, because of the many influences in our environment, it is very easy to get carried away and forget what our genuine intentions and needs are. We may become accustomed to a certain way of doing things and become a product of our environment. So we start to do what we are used to, what we know or what is expected of us (and we expect the same from those around us):

“You must study engineering, law or medicine.”

“You must work in banking or consulting if you want to be successful.”

“You must go to business school after three years of your professional career.”

“You must get married before a certain age.”

“You must get married…period

“You must have children before a certain age.”

“You must have children…period

“You must live in a certain area”

…the list goes on.

Why are we trying so hard to conform to what our environment says is normal? Is that what would make us truly happy? What if we find something that is not conventional, which is completely different from what we are used to...but might work for us? Would we allow the fear of the unknown cast doubt on that unconventional situation or are we ready to take that risk? What if it doesn’t work out? But what if it could be great?

Change is scary, but we might need to take that risk sometimes because breaking out of conventional thought and expectations could yield amazing results.

… and really, the comfort zone is…well, comfortable.

Oyin Egbeyemi is an engineer-turned-consultant-turned-educationist, runner and writer. She blogs at https://thevoiceofsamanthabrown.blogspot.com.ng/ and you can follow her on instagram (@samantha_brwn) or twitter (@OyinEgbeyemi)

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