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11 signs you're in a rebound relationship

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  • A "rebound relationship" can occur when someone is dating a new person without being entirely over their ex .
  • Those in a rebound relationship may feel like their relationship is moving very fast or their partner isn't committing to plans.
  • Those who aren't totally over their ex may also struggle to form new emotional attachments.

Dating someone new can be exciting, but sometimes the person you're dating isn't totally over their previous relationship and it can lead to a "rebound relationship."

According to Psychology Today, a rebound relationship can occur when someone's dating a new person without being entirely over their ex. And it could make it difficult for the individual to form strong emotional connections or genuine relationships.

"The rebound relationship, it is believed, takes up the space that was left by the previous relationship and provides both stability and distraction from loss rather than working through [it]," Mary C. Lamia Ph.D. , a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst, wrote for Psychology Today.And while it may seem like a tough situation to be in, there are instances where the individuals in the relationship aren't aware it's happening.

That being said, everyone heals and moves forward in different ways and along different timelines. Dating someone who was recently in a relationship doesn't mean you're part of a rebound relationship.

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Here are 11 signs that you could be in a rebound relationship.

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If you find the person that you've found interest in is mentioning their ex both rapidly and frequently, Dr. Damian J. Sendler a forensic sexologist, chief of sexology, and director of clinical research programs at Felnett Health Research Foundation told INSIDER that this is a massive clue that you could just be their rebound.

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"Why mention past if it doesn't help present?" he said. "This is a sign that someone is basically preparing you for some weird 'a-ha!' moment or advances from their ex."

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Although love at first sight could be possible, if you've started to date someone and it feels like the relationship is moving way too fast, it's probably because it is.

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"Relationships are meant to be cultivated slowly," Dr. Sendler said. "When things happen way too fast, like you check out 10 places in a week and sprint through activities, it's a weird, but telling sign of you being a rebound."

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Getting to know someone that you're interested in by being inquisitive is a good way to build up the relationship. But if asking questions has turned into something that feels more invasive, however, Dr. Sendler told INSIDER that it may be because you're in a rebound relationship.

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"If you feel like you're being interviewed, someone is trying to pre-screen you to see if you're like their ex," he said. "Building relationships takes time and when someone rushes through the process, it's a bad sign you're just a replacement."

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It may feel as if you're moving into something loving if your date has started introducing you to their friends with a cool title, but that could really just be a way for them to attempt to show that they're over their ex.

"You can tell when someone feels desperate to get you to know their friends," said Dr. Sendler. "They may even introduce you as 'the greatest' or something more elaborate. Even if your partner is a social butterfly, they should know better to cherish one-on-one time versus hanging out with half of the city as soon as possible."

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Receiving a compliment from the person that you're dating may seem like the cutest or sweetest thing in the world, but if you're noticing that they're constantly going out of their way to do it, it could be a sign you're in a rebound relationship.

"If you're making a meal for your partner, but he/she compliments you on three other things unrelated to cooking, it's a sign they are overcompensating," Dr. Sendler told INSIDER. "There are no rules of how romanticism should happen, but it should be natural and spontaneous."

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Certified relationship coach and co-owner of Double Trust Dating Jonathan Bennett told INSIDER that a telltale sign of being in a rebound relationship is not being able to connect with someone emotionally.

"If you're just a rebound, the person you're dating has no intention of keeping you around long-term," he said. "Consequently, he or she will make little effort to facilitate emotional bonding. If the relationship seems extremely casual or focused only on sex, it's possible you're just a rebound."

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Have you ever been on a date and the only thing they talk about is how their ex is behaving currently or how they're ex is doing? This is a huge sign that they may not as into you as you think.

"If your current partner seems more interested in his or her ex than forming a real relationship with you, it's a red flag that you're being used to help get over the ex," he told INSIDER. "Two signs are: your partner stalking their ex on social media and constantly complaining to you about him or her."

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Dating someone new can definitely be exciting but when it feels like you aren't moving forward, it could be that the relationship you're in is a rebound one.

"Most relationships reach milestones in a reasonable amount of time," Bennett told INSIDER. "This could include meeting family and friends, being public about the relationship on social media, and saying 'I love you' for the first time. If the relationship doesn't seem to be moving along in a natural and timely manner, it's possible that your partner only sees you as a short-term option."

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According to relationship coach and director of Blue Lotus Mind Coaching & Training Tiffany Toombs, if the emotions radiating from your new love interest are still a bit shaky when it comes to their ex, they may not be able to fully commit to a relationship with you.

"If the person you're dating still has a lot of fresh anger, hurt or other negative emotions relating to their break-up, you could possibly be a rebound," she said. "People who haven't dealt with and healed the wounds from their previous relationships are often not in an emotionally stable or emotionally available place to commit to a new relationship wholeheartedly."

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Although it takes time for you to feel comfortable enough to introduce the person you're dating to those closest to you (and vice versa), it probably shouldn't take forever. So, if a decent amount of time has passed and your partner has expressed no interest in introducing you to those closest to them, it may be time to consider the position you actually hold in their life and that could be as a rebound.

"Someone who is truly committed to a long-term relationship will have no problem introducing their partner or the person they care about to their friends and family," Toombs said. "Keeping you away from the rest of their life is often a red flag that this relationship won't last."

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If you've tried to make advanced plans with your date and they continuously turn you down, it could mean they don't foresee a long-term relationship with you. Telling you that they'll let you know as the date gets closer is not always because they're busy.

"Whether the plans are a couple weeks away or a couple months away, a partner who is reluctant to discussing the future is something to take note of," Toombs told INSIDER. "It's truly a sign that they aren't convinced the relationship will go the distance."

Visit INSIDER's homepage for more.

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