Are there acceptable justifications for cheating on one's spouse?
Everyone hopes to not be that partner who does it, and those who somehow fall into the 'mistake' are expected to feel ashamed, sober and remorseful when caught, no matter what their reasons for doing so are.
The women listed below [not their real identities] have been unfaithful in their marriages but they feel no remorse whatsoever for their actions. And here are their reasons, gathered from "Cheating without Regrets" on Women's Health.
1. I was pressured into marriage at an early age
Busola says "I got married at 24 to a person I didn't love but settled for because everyone was putting pressure on me to tie the knot. My family told me that I should focus on marriage instead of a career. Our marriage was dead on arrival, and we just clung to each other because we didn't know what else to do. Three years in, I met someone else at work, and we had an affair.”
2. I don't love the person I cheated with
Chika says "I don't regret cheating because I didn't love the person I cheated with. I slept with a guy I met out one night at a club where I was celebrating a girlfriend’s birthday.
In my eyes, it wasn't a big deal because there wasn't an emotional connection. It was just sex. I’ve been married for four years, and I truly love my husband. I don't plan on telling him because I don’t want to ruin our marriage over a person I don’t care about at all."
3. He cheated first
Bolanle says "What comes around goes around. I found out my husband was cheating with a neighbor, so I cheated back. I wanted to hurt him like he hurt me. When my husband walked in on us, he was shocked. I saw him cry, but it felt good to get him back for the pain he caused me. Obviously, we ended up getting a divorce, and I was fine with that."
4. He didn't touch me for two years
Monica says "I don't regret cheating because I feel like I had to do it for us to get to the place we are at now. My husband and I hadn't slept together in two years. I needed sex. So I slept with a stranger. Cheating actually helped me realize that I needed to do something about our sex issues. I never told my husband about the affair, but I decided it was time to go to couples therapy and sort out our lack of sex. After going to therapy, we started trying new things in bed and making it a priority to have alone time together. Our relationship has never been stronger. "
5. I was just bored
Mariam says "I was tired of being a stay-at-home mom who wasn't treated well by her husband. My husband never called me beautiful and practically ignored me. I ended up secretly dating a guy that lived in the neighborhood and was recently divorced. It was my adventure, and it made me feel good about myself. The side guy knew about my husband and didn’t care. He wanted a girlfriend without all the attachment that came with it, so it was a mutual agreement. When my husband walked in on us one afternoon, he screamed that he wanted a divorce and I was okay with that."
What do you think about these, are there even acceptable justifications for cheating on one's spouse? Please vote in the opinion poll below.