Marriage is one of the biggest commitments you would make in your lifetime and it is only wise you make the best decision.
It is one of the biggest commitments you have to make in your lifetime and it is only wise you make the best decision.
As such, it is mandatory that certain things are discussed between the couple and an agreement be made before saying ‘I do’.
1. Discuss the family’s income: As finances tend to be a big issue between the couples it is only wise to discuss it. Talk about how much you earn, how much you are willing to invest in the family you are planning to have, how much you are willing to give your parents etc.
Work with a budget to build the best family.
2. Discuss family planning: Discuss contraceptives methods, the number of children you would love to have, the age spacing between the children, gender of the children etc.
3. Build a friendly relationship with your in-laws: This is mostly from ladies who feel their mother-in-laws are monsters sent from the pit of hell. Go into every marriage with a clean heart, don’t judge based on what you have heard or what you perceive.
We all are humans and tend to have negative traits, instead of dwelling on your in-law’s negatives focus on the positives.
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4. Attend premarital counselling: Either it is a counselling section with your religious head, or elders in your community, or a relationship expert, make sure you book for a counselling class once a week.
5. Discuss intimacy: Discuss sexual positions and sexual limits. Know what turns your partner on and off in the bedroom.
6. Discuss house chores: In this era of gender equality and feminism, you should discuss everything to the tiniest bits and be sure all parties are happy with the decision made. Make sure you discuss who does what in the home. If she cooks, would you wash the dishes? And if you hate washing dishes what would you rather do? These are important questions the couple needs to ask themselves.
7. Fix a day for special dinners or friend’s moment: Set a day termed special by both of you when you can go out for dinner.
Being in a marriage doesn’t stop you from hanging out with friends, set out ‘me’ time.
8. Discuss your career: Ask questions like what do you want to do next? How would you achieve it?
Discuss your short and long-term career plans as a couple.
Once you have noted these eight things you should do, then you are most definitely ready to share your heart with someone else.
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