Believe it or not, compatibility should be of more priority than love when it comes to relationships.
If you have a list of things you want in your spouse, he/she can check all the boxes when it comes to physical attributes, but not behavioral.
1. You can tolerate each other’s flaws.
No man is perfect! That’s true, but as humans, some things are easily ignored than others. Never be in a relationship with the mindset that you can change all the habits you cannot tolerate.
Identify the habits you can live with and the kinds you cannot tolerate.
“To be great partners, you cannot expect perfection. Everyone has their quirks and flaws, and to be healthy together you need to make sure you see these imperfections as endearing. Marriages break up over an accumulation of ‘small stuff.’ Do what you can to love unconditionally,” says Sherrie Campbell a licensed psychology.
2. You share the same core values.
If you share the same core values, then making decisions for your partner in his/her absence would never be an issue. This is because all decisions made would be guarded by those values.
If integrity and honesty is your watchword, you word never do anything to jeopardize it.
According to Clinical psychologist and sex and relationship therapist, Megan Flaming, sharing the same values is like having the same inner compass.
“When the going gets tough, like it does in all relationships, knowing that you share the same core values makes difficult decisions easier because you both have the same inner compass. Core values are the foundation of a strong relationship.”
3. You are comfortable sharing your dark secrets with your spouse.
No secrets between compatible couples. No matter how bad the situation is you know the right moment to let them in.
According to Clinical Pyschologist, Ryan Howes, compatible couples share details of both the good and bad news together. They cheer other; they feel safe in each other’s hands.
“Got a promotion? Won the lottery? No cavities? Your ideal partner will be the person who will be your biggest cheerleader and want to celebrate these victories without jealousy or scorekeeping. But also, in every life a little rain must fall. Compatible partners feel safe enough to splash in the puddles with one another. It takes a great deal of trust to disclose vulnerable, painful elements of your life to someone so important to you, but the strongest couples can withstand this strain and provide support while working toward a solution. If you can’t let your significant other help you when you’re down, how close are you, really?”
4. You have a similar definition of fun.
Compatible couples need to have similar ideas on the word fun. Communicate your sexual fantasies, type of adventures you would love to have etc.
According to Sherry Campbell, couples who play together, stay together.
“People who play together stay together. Healthy couples are great playmates and enjoy being active together. Being active is a time to be best friends, to be outside and to be together.”
5. You are committed to growing together.
Compatible couples are committed to the relationship.
According to Clinical psychologist and sex and relationship therapist, Megan Flaming, the happiest couples are committed to their own respective growth.
“The man or woman you marry today will not be the same person in a year, five years or ten years. The happiest couples are those committed to their own respective personal growth as well as their growth as a couple. Your relationship is a place to heal any unfinished business from childhood.” Megan Fleming