ADVERTISEMENT

"My babe now acts cold to me, how do I turn the situation around?"

She no longer comes to my place anymore. I’m confused [because] even when I call her, she sounds dull and tired.

Relationship Talk

Dear Bukky,My name is Chike, [and] for some days now my relationship with my girlfriend has been cold.

She sounds like she's no longer interested but she always say I’m angry with her.

She no longer comes to my place anymore. I’m confused even when I call her she sounds dull and tired.

I really love her and I don't want to lose her. What should I do?---------------

ADVERTISEMENT

Hi reader,

Your contact with us is much appreciated.

I feel the best the first/best thing to do is to watch the way you speak or act to her. Whatever is being said to make her feel that you are angry with her needs to be stopped.

You need to always make her feel safe and happy; not scared and worried. That could be why she is acting cold to you.

If, however, you have been gentle, kind and loving to her as your mail suggests, then, this matter seems pretty straight forward.

ADVERTISEMENT

All you mentioned are the signs you see or notice when someone has lost interest in a relationship.

So you are quite right with that assessment. Your girlfriend seems no longer interested in what you have going.

To get her back as you said, the first step is to understand what made her lose interest.

Without that, you might not know how to handle the situation successfully.

I think you should try to contact her in any manner that will get your message across to her.

ADVERTISEMENT

These things, as I always say, are easily fixed with communication.

Even if she is unwilling or reluctant to have a honest, open conversation with you about the situation, you need to be a bit persistent, and try all possible means to get her to come clean about what is really happening. [Please do not be violent or abusive, though.]

Has she met someone else, or is she pissed about something you did? There has to be a reason for the lukewarm attitude and until you find out what it is, you probably can’t do much.

If she comes out with what the problem is, then you can apologise if it was something you did wrong, or change something she does not want you doing again, or any other thing that will restore the relationship.

If she does not tell you what’s actually happening though, you might need to move on after a while.

ADVERTISEMENT

You can’t possibly win all battles. It might hurt, but you will have to accept at some point that the relationship has come to an end.

Let's hope, though, that things won’t degenerate to that level.

I have high hopes for you getting back with your girlfriend.

Go get her!___________________________

Do you want to talk about your love life, marriage or family issues?

ADVERTISEMENT

Do you have burning questions that you would love to get answers to?

Just send a mail containing your question and location to relationships@pulse.ng,  and I'll provide the most honest answers to them anonymously.

So, why not send that mail today and let's talk about it?

A problem shared is a problem half-solved!

JOIN OUR PULSE COMMUNITY!

Unblock notifications in browser settings.
ADVERTISEMENT

Eyewitness? Submit your stories now via social or:

Email: eyewitness@pulse.ng

Recommended articles

10 ways to manage period bloating

10 ways to manage period bloating

Here’s why patients treated by female doctors have a better chance of recovery

Here’s why patients treated by female doctors have a better chance of recovery

7 dangerous herbs you should avoid during pregnancy

7 dangerous herbs you should avoid during pregnancy

What happened to the bodies from the Titanic — the poor still suffered

What happened to the bodies from the Titanic — the poor still suffered

Grant’s Crews Night Out: Where were you last Friday? Peek at what you missed

Grant’s Crews Night Out: Where were you last Friday? Peek at what you missed

Never make promises under these 4 situations

Never make promises under these 4 situations

Why commercial aeroplanes don't have parachutes for passengers

Why commercial aeroplanes don't have parachutes for passengers

7 groups of people not allowed by the gov't to adopt children

7 groups of people not allowed by the gov't to adopt children

Items & services you will pay for twice the normal price during rainy season

Items & services you will pay for twice the normal price during rainy season

Experience Moët Hennessy with some of the best drink Vendors in Nigeria

Experience Moët Hennessy with some of the best drink Vendors in Nigeria

What panic attacks are and how to deal with them

What panic attacks are and how to deal with them

Here are 4 reasons men and women communicate differently — these can cause problems

Here are 4 reasons men and women communicate differently — these can cause problems

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT