Amazon just made your erections 43% cheaper

pulse

August 29, 2017 12:53 PM

The tech giant is taking over Whole Foods by reducing prices on healthy foods—including ones that cut your risk of erectile dysfunction.

Good news for your wallet and health—shopping at Whole Foods just got a heck of a lot cheaper for Amazon Prime members. On its first day as owner of the popular health foods store, Amazon has slashed prices by up to 43 percent, reports Bloomberg.

In June, Amazon announced its $13.7 billion buy-out of Whole Foods, which launches today, according to a press release.

“We’re determined to make healthy and organic food affordable for everyone. Everybody should be able to eat Whole Foods Market quality—we will lower prices without compromising Whole Foods Market’s long-held commitment to the highest standards,” said Jeff Wilke, CEO of Amazon Worldwide Consumer in the release. “To get started, we’re going to lower prices beginning Monday on a selection of best-selling grocery staples, including Whole Trade organic bananas, responsibly-farmed salmon, organic large brown eggs, animal-welfare-rated 85% lean ground beef, and more.”

After doing a price comparison in a Manhattan-based Whole Foods, Bloomberg found that the price of popular fruits, like organic bananas and apples, had dropped by 30 to 43 percent from last Thursday to today. Salmon dropped by 33 percent, avocados by 29 percent, and kale by 13 percent.

Here’s why you should care: Eating the right foods benefits your heart, your brain, and yes—even your erection.

The best options to keep your penis performing like a pro? Foods rich in antioxidants, like apples and blueberries. Foods rich in vitamin D, like salmon and milk, also top the list of foods your penis needs. Plus, anything that’s good for your heart, like legumes and olive oil, can also benefit your hard-on, since heart disease is one of the most common causes of erectile dysfunction.

So Prime members, rejoice and reap the benefits. The savings won’t stop today, either. Once the program is completely integrated, Amazon Prime members will also become part of a Whole Foods customer rewards program, so they’ll receive special savings and other in-store bonuses.

A lower price for higher-quality health? We’ll take it.

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