5 grown-ups get drunk and brawl at a Chuck E. Cheese’s

Imagine getting hammered at a Chuck E. Cheese’s.

Maybe you’re bored at your kid’s birthday party. Maybe you celebrated a little too hard after hitting the jackpot in Skee-ball. Maybe the animatronic rodents have opened up a deep emotional wound that you’ve subconsciously been repressing for years, and your only salvation is some sweet, sweet hooch.

Regardless of how you landed in the situation, there’s really only one way out: You’re going to get into a fight at that Chuck E. Cheese’s, you’re going to get arrested, and you’re going to be made fun of on the Internet.

That’s what happened in Everett, Massachusetts last weekend, where five grown-ups were charged with assault, disorderly conduct, and carrying a dangerous weapon after getting drunk and brawling at their local Chuck E. Cheese’s, according to the Boston Globe.

CEC Entertainment Inc. released a statement that shed a little more light on the fight.

“The issue was caused by a guest who procured and consumed alcohol outside our premises, as we do not serve alcohol at this location,” the statement read. (Didn’t know that. Noted.)

When a nearby officer showed up to rein in the riff-raff, things escalated. One guy became belligerent, allegedly urged his buddies to raise hell, and punched and kicked the cops, per the Boston Globe.

“It’s extremely disappointing to see adults behave in this manner in an establishment that is designed for young family fun,” said Everett Police Chief Steven Mazzie in a hilarious, but profoundly sad statement that he was surely required to make.