Which other consumables should we try to launch into space, so that we may never eat them again? Here are five suggestions
Over the weekend, a group of British scientists strapped a meat pie to a weather balloon and launched it into Earth’s stratosphere.
The Brits wanted to see how high altitude affects pie’s molecular structure, according to Metro of the U.K. They hope that the pie’s 29-mile-high journey into the stratosphere will make the pastry easier to eat so that he could win the World Pie Eating Championship, which takes place tomorrow in Wigan, England.
This glorious feat got us wondering: Which other consumables should we try to launch into space, so that we may never eat them again? Here are five suggestions.
1. Birthday Cake Oreos
If you ever find yourself torn between eating a birthday cake and eating Oreos, but can’t decide, it’s time to reassess your approach to making smart diet choices. To the moon!
Stop trying to pass off strands of zucchini or squash or whatever the hell else you passed through a spiralizer as “pasta.” That’s not pasta. That’s lying.
3. Rose Petal Cardamom Curry Powder Donuts
Leave it to “artisinal” bakeries to take something perfectly good (the plain donut) and ruin it with specialty ingredients designed for Instagram likes.
4. Boneless Wings
Face it: These are just an excuse for adults to eat chicken fingers.
5. Maple Water
And coconut water. And watermelon water. And cactus water. You know what’s the best water? Water.