ADVERTISEMENT

13 ways you knew you were in trouble as a child

Nigerians mothers have a name they call you when they are happy, and another one for when they are angry.

Wouldn't it be nice to just chip in a few things of what it was like growing up in Nigeria? Especially those terrifying things?

This wahala is about to start in the house.

1. When your mother calls your full name.

ADVERTISEMENT

Oh Lord!

2. When your mum would normally speak English but she switches to your local language.

Local language. Local violence.

3. When your father greets you welcome with a glowing smile.

Welcome my son. Come and suffer.

ADVERTISEMENT

4. When your father just got back from work and he starts looking for his belt.

Brutality.

5. When your teacher is complaining about your unseriousness but your mum is just looking very calm.

When we get home, we shall see.

6. When your mother goes to bed early after you’ve offended her.

ADVERTISEMENT

See you in the midnight when I come to wake you up with belt.

7. When they start to ask you impossible questions that don't have answers.

Did you chop shit?

8. When you're being foolish in front of a visitor.

Better follow them when they are leaving.

ADVERTISEMENT

9. When you and your mum are joking and she just smiles at you and says “You’ve grown wings abi?”

Izz like you don’t know your mate again.

10. In the middle of Afmag Yoruba, she suddenly mutes the TV and remembers one mistake you made 2 years ago.

Oya, tell me what you did. I’m listening.

11. When your parents are arguing and you suddenly hear them screaming your name.

ADVERTISEMENT

When the elephants fight.

12. When your mother used her last money to cook soup and the morning after, it is already sour.

Mummy its nor me.

13. When your dad says “Tell me the truth, I won’t beat you.”

Say the truth and it shall fuck you up.

JOIN OUR PULSE COMMUNITY!

Unblock notifications in browser settings.
ADVERTISEMENT

Eyewitness? Submit your stories now via social or:

Email: eyewitness@pulse.ng

Recommended articles

7 do's and don’ts of the Holy month of Ramadan

7 do's and don’ts of the Holy month of Ramadan

Top 5 sweetest celebrity mother-child relationships that stand out for us

Top 5 sweetest celebrity mother-child relationships that stand out for us

International Women's Day: 5 Nigerian female celebrities championing women’s rights

International Women's Day: 5 Nigerian female celebrities championing women’s rights

Top 5 female directors in Nollywood

Top 5 female directors in Nollywood

6 things that will break a Muslim's fast during Ramadan

6 things that will break a Muslim's fast during Ramadan

5 benefits of fasting during Ramadan

5 benefits of fasting during Ramadan

Dos and don’ts of supporting Muslims during Ramadan

Dos and don’ts of supporting Muslims during Ramadan

5 young women who embody Y2K and alte fashion

5 young women who embody Y2K and alte fashion

How March became women's history month

How March became women's history month

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT